IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours sunshine per year in three major cities. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons wheere relevant

The graph and table below show the average monthly temperatures and the average number of hours sunshine per year in three major cities. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons wheere relevant
The line
gragh
Correct your spelling
graph
 illustrates the ups and downs of the average monthly
tepertures
Correct your spelling
temperatures
 of
London
Use synonyms
, New
York
Use synonyms
 and Sydney, and the table below compares the total
anuual
Correct your spelling
annual
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 for the three countries.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the trend of monthly temperatures in
Sydeny
Correct your spelling
Sydney
 is different
than
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the other two
contries
Correct your spelling
countries
, which
reaches
Correct subject-verb agreement
reach
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 highest in January and
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 lowest in July. We can see from the table that New
York
Use synonyms
 is under
sunshine
Use synonyms
 for the most
hours
Use synonyms
anuanlly
Correct your spelling
annually
,
while
Linking Words
 the total
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in a year for
London
Use synonyms
 is the lowest. It can be
discoverd
Correct your spelling
discovered
 that both New
York
Use synonyms
 and
London
Use synonyms
 reach the summer around in June, July, and
Augest
Correct your spelling
August
,
while
Linking Words
Sydeny's
Correct your spelling
Sydney's
 summer is during December, January and February.
However
Linking Words
, the lowest and the
lighest
Correct your spelling
highest
 average monthly temperatures in New
York
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 around 4
celsius
Fix capitalization
Celsius
show examples
 and 30
celsius
Fix capitalization
Celsius
show examples
, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 lower and higher than
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
 in
London
Use synonyms
. From the information
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the table, we can find that the
anuual
Correct your spelling
annual
hours
Use synonyms
 of bearing to
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in New
York
Use synonyms
,
London
Use synonyms
 and Sydney are 2535, 1180 and 2473
seperately
Correct your spelling
respectively
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words london, york, hours, sunshine with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reaches" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: