Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
Use synonyms
have argued that authorities ought to invest in railways
instead
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of building new roads. I strongly agree with
this
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proposal, since it offers a combination of unique features, contributing to
people
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in various aspects, like transport and a clean environment. In today's world, modern trains can enhance the quality of individuals' lives by providing convenient transport, allowing them to implement their daily routines more comfortably.
Moreover
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, they encourage
people
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to use public transport
instead
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of their vehicles, reducing the amount of traffic in towns. As an example, the metro in Tehran, the capital of Iran, not only
has contributed
Wrong verb form
contributes
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Use synonyms
people to
Correct word order
to people
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carrying out their work but
also
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has meaningfully reduced congestion in the city.
Hence
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, spending money on these services plays a crucial role in city management, which guarantees a more enjoyable life for citizens in the society.
In addition
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, currently, modern locomotives utilise electricity as fuel
instead
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of fossil fuels, which is an invaluable point.
This
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feature assists in enhancing the quality of air and decreasing the costs of side effects of pollution, including lung diseases, drought, and global warming, all of which have increased incredibly in these days.
For instance
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, the old trains,
due to
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using coal, produced more CO2, leading to polluted air and raising the costs of
a
Correct article usage
the
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country.
Thus
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, the more modern the systems are, the less contamination they produce.
To sum up
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, I believe that capitalising on railways helps
people
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in diverse aspects of their lives and presents remarkable features, affecting the quality of life and environment.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph clearly connects to your main points with topic sentences.
Task Achievement
Add more specific examples to support your ideas, making them clearer for the reader.
Task Achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
You provided a good structure with clear paragraphs, which helps in understanding your ideas.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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