IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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Nowadays
enormous
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people try to compete
become
Fix the infinitive
to become
show examples
 successful in the future through their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
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 or
education
Use synonyms
. There is a lot of discussion about the meaning of
success
Use synonyms
 and it will be different among others. I believe to become a
success
Use synonyms
are
Verb problem
I will
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getting
Wrong verb form
get
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high
Correct article usage
a high
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education
Use synonyms
 level
and
Correct word choice
apply
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bring
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
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 impact and contribute to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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 of them believe
to become
Change preposition
that becoming
show examples
Use synonyms
success
Replace the word
successful
show examples
 in the
futures
Fix the agreement mistake
future
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 is always their
Use synonyms
goals
Fix the agreement mistake
goal
show examples
. The
Use synonyms
goals
Add a verb
goals are
goals were
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 absolutely different for each
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
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 and
also
Linking Words
 have
the
Correct article usage
apply
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various
of
Change preposition
apply
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purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
 in their life
such
Linking Words
 as
became
Wrong verb form
becoming
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 a doctor, business owner, or president.
For instance
Linking Words
, becoming a doctor is difficult because it is a long journey (almost 7 years) and the competition
also
Linking Words
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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this
Linking Words
 more challenging.
For business
Change preposition
Business
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owner
Fix the agreement mistake
owners
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,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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might
be failed
Wrong verb form
fail
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 many times and
also
Linking Words
 affect
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
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both physical and emotional aspects.
However
Linking Words
, to overcome myriad problems they need to learn persistently and put in a concern
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a daily basis
such
Linking Words
 as trying to connect alumni from the university and read more news
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 to get
a current information
Remove the article
current information
a piece of current information
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the meaning of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
success
Use synonyms
 for me is
become
Fix the infinitive
to become
show examples
 the Director in
banking
Add an article
the banking
show examples
 industry through higher
education
Use synonyms
 and
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
 to contribute
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
show examples
 impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. Looking at the previous Director, the background
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
 impressive and
also
Linking Words
 taking a top university
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
global
Change the word
globally
show examples
 has become the key reason. I
learn
Wrong verb form
learned
show examples
 a lot how
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 them, they not only focus on the business
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 contribute to the other
such
Linking Words
 as
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 a speaker in
global
Add an article
the global
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 financial sector and
spread
Wrong verb form
spreading
show examples
 to the empowerment community.
To conclude
Linking Words
, the meaning of
succes
Correct your spelling
success
 for each
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
has
Verb problem
is
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 different
as well as
Linking Words
 depends on the
goals
Use synonyms
. I believe
to get
Change preposition
that getting
show examples
 a higher
education
Use synonyms
 and bringing more positive impact have always been my future
goals
Use synonyms

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grammar
Make sure to proofread for grammatical errors and awkward phrases. Some sentences are hard to understand due to minor grammatical issues.
cohesion
Improve the transitions between paragraphs to make the text flow more smoothly. For example, using phrases like 'Moreover,' or 'In contrast,' could help linkage.
task achievement
Clarify and elaborate your points with more specific examples and detailed reasoning. While you provide examples, more specific instances would enrich your essay.
structure
You have included a clear introduction and a conclusion, which helps in framing the essay well.
task achievement
Your essay addresses different interpretations of success, and you provide personal reflections on the idea of success.
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