University students are increasingly studying abroad as part of their studies. Do the advantages of studying abroad outweigh(opinon) disadvantages?

Nowadays, there are many international
students
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willing to study abroad to continue their degrees. In my opinion,
students
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may struggle with homesickness, which can distract them from their studies.
This
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essay will argue why the disadvantages outweigh the
advantages
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,as
students
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will suffer
by
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from
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overthinking about their families and,
as a result
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, they may not focus on their academic subjects. Admittedly, one of the minor
advantages
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of studying abroad is learning different cultures and traditions
as well as
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gaining new experiences.
This
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can help them in the future when they communicate with people, as it shows that they are educated about many societies. One clear example of
this
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is that
students
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can try different cuisines in restaurants
as well as
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visit historical museums and art galleries close to where they live. All in all,
this
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can help them explore themselves and discover their passions.
Moreover
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, it can educate them in various ways and expand their knowledge of different cultures. Despite the
advantages
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above, one of the major disadvantages is that overseas
students
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are likely to miss their families and friends, which can trouble their mental
health
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.
For example
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,
students
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may overthink the things they miss out on in their country,
such
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as festivals, family weddings, and big occasions.
This
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could lead to poor performance in their studies
as well as
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mental
health
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problems
such
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as depression. All in all,
students
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studying abroad may face major challenges that worsen their mental
health
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.
To conclude
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, overseas
students
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are now studying abroad for many reasons. I believe that the disadvantages outweigh the
advantages
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because
students
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may suffer from mental
health
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issues
due to
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missing out on important occasions, even though they have the opportunity to explore a new culture.

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task response
Make your view clear in every part. Keep the main idea in mind and add more facts to back it up.
coherence
Link ideas with simple words like 'also', 'but', 'so', 'therefore'. Use clear topic sentences in each paragraph.
language
Check long or hard words and fix grammar so the reader can read easily.
content
You show a clear view that the disadvantages are strong.
content
There are real examples about homesickness and the wish to see family.
structure
There is a basic in and out of the essay: intro, body, and end.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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