IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The use of smartphones has increased rapidly. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

In recent years, the usage of
smartphones
Use synonyms
 has been significantly rising. In the following essay, I intend to discuss both the merits and demerits of
this
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 trend. One of the key benefits of
smartphones
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 is accessibility. Everyone can get whatever they want, stay in touch with family and friends, purchase and order things online, and even find occupations.
For instance
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, it is an established fact that many
people
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 have started working online via their
smartphones
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. It makes work much easier and
also
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 helps
people
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 save
time
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.
Thus
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,
people
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 do not need to spend
time
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 stuck on the road.
In addition
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,
smartphones
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 provide quick access to information.
Therefore
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,
people
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 can find information about anything they wish to know. Despite its positive aspects, there are several drawbacks that should be considered.
However
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, regular smartphone use can lead to predicaments related to
time
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 management. Many
people
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 struggle
due to
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 a lack of
time
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.
For instance
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,
people
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 always waste their
time
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by
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apply
show examples
scrolling through social media too much. In today’s fast-paced world, individuals are often unaware of how quickly
time
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 goes by.
Moreover
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, frequent usage of
smartphones
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 without limits can cause eye problems.
For example
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, many young
people
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 experience eye discomfort
due to
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 prolonged screen
time
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.
As a result
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, they spend the majority of their
time
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 on their phones and struggle with eye issues. In conclusion,
while
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 using
smartphones
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 offers greater possibilities and easy occupations, it
also
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 presents serious challenges,
such
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 as
time
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 management and health issues.
Therefore
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, both the benefits and drawbacks should be carefully considered by individuals before using their phones.

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task
Make your view clear in the intro or last line; this helps the reader know your stance.
task
Add more detail to each idea; give one or two facts or small examples for each point.
coherence
Link ideas smoothly so the text flows; use small linking words like first, next, also, but, however.
structure
End with a strong closing sentence that sums up your view.
language
Use simple and easy words; avoid long phrases not needed.
structure
The essay uses a clear layout: intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
content
The ideas are easy to see and show both sides.
content
Examples are easy to understand and relate to real life.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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