IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and charts bellow give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.

The table and charts bellow give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.
The given table and pie charts depict the data about how the British
police
Use synonyms
had been
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 funded and spent money in 2017 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
 government was the main source of money for the
police
Use synonyms
budget
Use synonyms
 in both years, followed by local taxes,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest amount of
budget
Use synonyms
 was earned from other sources.
This
Linking Words
budget
Use synonyms
 was spent on three different categories, with salaries having the biggest share. The national government funded the
police
Use synonyms
 the most with 175.5 in 2017, and
this
Linking Words
 figure
had risen
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 slightly
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 177 in 2018. Local taxes, as a second source of funding, dedicated 91.5 m in 2017
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
this
Linking Words
 amount rose to 102. The
budget
Use synonyms
 deficit,
however
Linking Words
, was supplied by other sources,
such
Linking Words
 as grants
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 witnessed the lowest
incline
Check wording
increase
show examples
 from 38 in 2017 to 38.5 in 2018. In 2017,
although
Linking Words
 the largest proportion of
police
Use synonyms
budget
Use synonyms
 expenditure was on officers and staff salaries accounted for three-quarters of total spending, which
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 to 69% in 2018,
this
Linking Words
 figure was the lowest for technology , with a moderate rise from 8% in 2017 to 14% in 2018.
police
Use synonyms
 spending on buildings and transport stood at 17% in 2017 and remained unchanged following year.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words police, budget with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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