IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Ambition is being emphasized in today’s society. How important do you think it is for people who want to succeed in life? Is it a popsitive or negative characteristic?

In today’s world, fierce competition has been an inevitable part of people’s
lives
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, especially for those who are eager to achieve secular
success
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. Being ambitious is regarded as an essential element in the process of seeking
success
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, which is undoubtedly important,
whereas
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 there are
also
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 many other factors underlying deeply in personality, which may contribute
together with
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ambition
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 to achievements.
Although
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 the general explanation of
ambition
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 is to describe those who try every method to
access
Verb problem
achieve
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 their targets, it is undeniable that the quality is of great value in pursuing
success
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. Bearing clear purposes in mind and making all efforts to achieve them are necessary steps when individuals want to have better
lives
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, particularly when the target is far more ideal than others’.
In addition
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, to overcome those tough difficulties, being ambitious can help build perseverance so that people may possess a sense of responsibility to have confidence in achieving goals. It is evident that
ambition
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 is a positive characteristic
considering
Punctuation problem
, considering
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the
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 application in the workplace and daily
lives
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. As a famous Chinese saying goes, “
those
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Those
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 who are not interested in becoming generals are not good soldiers.” If an employee is always satisfied with what he or she has already attained, it may be an obstacle to being promoted
as
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, as
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 the lack of motivation may lead to reduced working efficiency.
In addition
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, what people ignore easily in daily
lives
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 is the eagerness to bond closely with family members, which is
also
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 a form of
ambition
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 towards better
lives
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. Only when people
realize
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realise
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 the sense of
ambition
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 can they obtain the key to
success
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. In conclusion,
ambition
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 brings tangible significance to life. It is conceivable that being ambitious is a symbol of
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
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 attitude in achieving
success
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.

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task response
Your view that ambition can push a person to work is clear. To be stronger, add more balance by also discussing when ambition can hurt or lead to bad choices.
task response
Some ideas are good but the essay does not give many exact facts or links to real life. Add one more clear example to show a point.
coherence cohesion
Use simple links to show how ideas go together, for example: first, then, also, but, so. This helps flow.
coherence cohesion
Some long sentences make the read slow. Break long lines into two shorter sentences.
strength
Clear view that ambition can push a person to work hard
technique
A proverb is used to back the idea
content
Examples from work and family life show the idea in real life

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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