IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

There is a growing global interest in
alternative
Use synonyms
 therapies as methods of treating illnesses.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that most of these practices are ineffective and potentially harmful, for reasons that will be discussed below. On the one hand, people often turn to
alternative
Use synonyms
 treatments when conventional
medicine
Use synonyms
 cannot guarantee full recovery. Serious diseases
such
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 as certain cancers or chronic conditions remain difficult to cure, and patients may look for additional sources of hope. In
such
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 cases,
alternative
Use synonyms
medicine
Use synonyms
 can provide psychological comfort, since optimism and a positive attitude are known to support the healing process. For some individuals, simply believing in a treatment helps them cope better with illness.
On the other hand
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, relying only on unproven therapies can be dangerous. Many
alternative
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 remedies lack scientific evidence and may even interfere with prescribed treatment.
For example
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, herbal products sometimes reduce the effectiveness of professional drugs. A famous case is Steve Jobs, who postponed medical operations for his cancer in favour of
alternative
Use synonyms
 diets, a decision that may have shortened his life.
This
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 shows that replacing conventional care with untested methods can have serious consequences.
In addition
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,
alternative
Use synonyms
medicine
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 is often promoted for financial gain. Companies and individuals may sell ineffective products, taking advantage of vulnerable patients who are desperate for a cure.
This
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 not only wastes time and money but can
also
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 create false hope. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
alternative
Use synonyms
 therapies may provide emotional support, they should never replace professional medical care. Modern
medicine
Use synonyms
 continues to improve, and people should rely on scientific treatment as the safest and most effective option.

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task response
Make your start clear. Say your view in one short line, then add points to back it up.
coherence
Use clear links in the text. Use words like First, Then, Finally to show how ideas go together.
task response
Give more proof or data for your main points, not only say them. Include more small facts or names of studies if you can.
strength
You show a clear view on the topic.
strength
You use a real example (Steve Jobs) to show a harm from not using care.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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