IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Public libraries should provide books and not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. Do you agree or disagree?

Books
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 exist in public
libraries
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, but they are always limited in number. Providing high-tech
equipment
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 is necessary for learning more and searching immediately. I completely disagree with the statement that it wastes
space
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 and resources in public
libraries
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. Some small public
libraries
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 do not have enough
space
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 where arrange a variety of
books
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,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 it
is required
Wrong verb form
requires
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high-tech
equipment
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 to expand knowledge from the internet . Almost all public
libraries
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 in the big city have a small
space
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, and if they do not provide computer software, it is just a place that contains a few boring
books
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.
In addition
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, public
libraries
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 not only aboard people's knowledge through a variety of
books
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 but
also
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 create a modern study environment where people can come and study
together with
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 high-tech
equipment
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. The corporate
books
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 and high-tech can help them learn more about the outside with visually appealing
equipment
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 on a computer, videos, and DVDs based on knowledge from
books
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.
On the other hand
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 , high-tech
equipment
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 exists to help people search for information immediately when they are confused about their topic
books
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 .
For example
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, when they read the natural book, it just describes the special plant by words that make them can not imagine a picture ,
then
Linking Words
 they can search for it in computer software available in public
libraries
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.
Besides
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, high-tech media can help them relax after a long time by reading
books
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 with sound and visuals. In conclusion, I firmly believe that expensive media do not waste limited resources and
space
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 in public
libraries
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. The connection between
books
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 and high-tech helps them know clearly and become more interesting

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Task Response
State your view clearly in the first line and stay with it.
Coherence
Add one main idea per paragraph and use a clear topic sentence.
Coherence
Use simple linking words to show how ideas go together.
Task Response
Give a real, needed example to show your point.
Grammar
Check grammar and use short, clear sentences.
stance
The writer takes a clear side.
content
The idea that high tech can help learning is seen.
structure
There is some use of a counter point to show balance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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