IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funding from the government in order for them to cintinue with their work. To what extent do you agree?

A lot of
artists
Use synonyms
 , getting low earnings, should have financial support from the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 for
continueing
Correct your spelling
continuing
 their work. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 because
art
Use synonyms
 can increase a
country
Use synonyms
's popularity and
art
Use synonyms
 products can improve the
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 of a nation. In many
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
,
art
Use synonyms
 is the representation of them, which can be seen in
tourist-attraction
Use the right word
tourist attraction
show examples
 places
such
Linking Words
 as painted walls in a temple
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Thailand. People in
this
Linking Words
 field put
hard
Fix the agreement mistake
a lot of
show examples
 effort
to make
Change preposition
into making
show examples
such
Linking Words
 impressive things. It is so unfair to give them low salaries for their amazing work and keep all the
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the state. To
subsize
Correct your spelling
subsidise
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 make those masterpieces,
this
Linking Words
 can increase the
country
Use synonyms
's
recognization
Use the right word
recognition
show examples
 as
artist
Fix the agreement mistake
artists
show examples
 will be willing to make more
art
Use synonyms
stuffs
Check wording
apply
show examples
, and it can gain numerous of foreigners to visit the nation. If the government can be supportive
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
artists
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 will benefit them eventually.
For example
Linking Words
, many Thai
artists
Use synonyms
 have
not ever
Use the right word
never
show examples
recieved
Correct your spelling
received
 any funding for making
arts
Fix the agreement mistake
art
show examples
,which those arts have been
showed
Wrong verb form
shown
show examples
 in the national museum.
Art
Use synonyms
 products from a
country
Use synonyms
 are sold to foreigners increasingly for
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 few years
Punctuation problem
, since
show examples
since
Change preposition
as
show examples
 a trend of
art
Use synonyms
 toys and people
start
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 to get into
Use synonyms
art
Correct article usage
the art
show examples
 field
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
. There are a lot of styles for each
individuals
Fix the agreement mistake
individual
show examples
 to be interested in, compared to the past.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they tend to buy products with the style that they like. The income will go to the government through taxes. If the product makers get funds to create goods, the government will receive more money too.
For instance
Linking Words
, a lot of
art
Use synonyms
 goods being purchased have seven
percent
Use the right word
per cent
show examples
 of VAT included
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 in Thailand. In conclusion, a nation can gain some great benefits by funding
their
Fix the agreement mistake
its
show examples
artists
Use synonyms
 to continue creating masterpieces. In financial and
repetational
Correct your spelling
reputational
 way, the state
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
 advantages from
subsizing
Correct your spelling
subsidising
art
Use synonyms
 workers.

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structure
Plan your answer. Start with a clear statement of your view, then give two or three strong reasons and a short example for each.
structure
Make each paragraph have one main idea. Use a short topic sentence at the start of each paragraph.
language
Use simple linking words to show how ideas fit together: also, but, so, therefore, for example.
language
Check your spelling and grammar. Short, clear sentences are best.
content
Give one or two clear real examples. Facts or strong reasons can make your point stronger.
idea
You take a clear view that the gov should fund artists.
idea
You link art to money and travel, which is good for argument.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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