IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and charts detailed below give information about the police budget in 2017 and 2018 in an area of Britain. The table illustrates where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.

The table and charts detailed below give information about the police budget in 2017 and 2018 in an area of Britain. The table illustrates where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.
The table and charts
demonstrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
demonstrate
show examples
 data about the police budget in 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain.The table shows
source
Correct article usage
the source
show examples
 of income
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the charts illustrate how it was allocated.
Overall
Linking Words
Linking Words
due
Punctuation problem
, due
show examples
 to the enhance
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 local taxes,
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
 amount slightly
lifted up
Verb problem
increased
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,the distribution for salaries
slightly
Verb problem
is slightly
show examples
 downgraded because of allocations for technology. In 2017 National government raised 177.5m.
Eventually
Punctuation problem
Eventually,
show examples
 in the following year faced an additional
improvent
Correct your spelling
improvement
lifting
Punctuation problem
, lifting
show examples
 up to 177.8m.Local taxes
gone
Verb problem
have gone
show examples
 up by 11.1m from 91.2m to 102.3m.In
fact
Add a comma
fact,
show examples
this
Linking Words
 source faced
Correct article usage
a noticable
show examples
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
raise
Use the right word
rise
show examples
 compared to
Correct article usage
the ther
show examples
ther
Correct your spelling
other
 sources.Other sources like grants stayed almost
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
receiving
Punctuation problem
, receiving
show examples
 only
0.5
Correct article usage
a 0.5
show examples
m increase from 38.0m to 38.5m. In
general
Punctuation problem
general,
show examples
 money distributions represented almost
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 result in
one
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
year
Use the right word
one-year
show examples
 period.Distributions for salaries constituted 75% in 2017.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 in
2018
Punctuation problem
2018,
show examples
 it encountered a slight decrease by 6% to 69%.Allocations for technology went through
sharp
Correct article usage
a sharp
show examples
 increase from 8% to 14%.Buildings and transport
sharings
Check wording
share
show examples
 experienced no
imrovements
Correct your spelling
improvements
 in a single year.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words m with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • budget allocation
  • funding sources
  • government policies
  • economic conditions
  • community services
  • crime prevention
  • public safety
  • significant increase/decrease
  • distribution
  • assessment
  • reflection
  • allocation shifts
  • budget comparison
  • impact analysis
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