Some argue that governments should prioritize lowering environmental pollution and housing issues in order to prevent illness and disease. do you agree or disagree?

It is undeniable that air
pollution
Use synonyms
and poor housing have a negative impact on society.
While
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some people think that governments should prioritise lowering environmental
pollution
Use synonyms
and housing
issues
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to prevent diseases, there is an opposing argument.
This
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essay will discuss why I firmly agree with the first notion.
To begin
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with, environmental
pollution
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generates many health problems.
For example
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, cancer, breathing problems, early death, and a weaker immune system are some of the
consequenes
Correct your spelling
consequences
of
this
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phenomenon.
In addition
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, investment in solving polluted air lowers future governmental expenses. To illustrate, working on tackling
this
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issue not only
protect
Correct subject-verb agreement
protects
show examples
people's health but
also
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reduces the amount of money that will be spent on curing diseases in the future. Another point to consider is poor housing conditions, as they are
also
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associated with having diseases. It is possible to say that houses with
mold
Change the spelling
mould
show examples
, damp, or cold atmospheres contribute to making people sick.
For instance
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, a recent study pointed out that housing
issues
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such
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as those mentioned above lead to skin irritation, eczema, and many other illnesses.
This
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shows how not prioritising these obstacles leads to having many health
issues
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. Allocating a certain budget to tackle
environemental
Correct your spelling
environmental
pollution
Use synonyms
and poor housing does not mean to reduce the importance of investing in other sectors. It means that we have to focus on these
issues
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, so they do not consume huge efforts and expenditures in the future. Prevention through clean air and good homes saves money in the long run and helps many individuals earlier. In conclusion,
although
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some might argue that we must spend money on hospitals and jobs, I believe that reducing
pollution
Use synonyms
and improving housing should
also
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be a priority because it stops illness and helps the country in the long term.

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task response
Add a clear plan in the first paragraph so the reader knows your view and what you will say.
coherence
Improve link words to tie ideas. Use words like 'first', 'also', 'in addition', 'however', 'for example' to show flow.
coherence
Make the opposing view stronger and then give a clear counter. This makes your stance clear.
task response
Give more facts or data as proof for points like how pollution costs money later.
grammar
Keep sentences simple and short. Check spelling and phrase use.
structure
Your essay has a clear view and ends with a conclusion that restates your main idea.
content
You give some good examples and link them to health issues.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • pollution
  • housing
  • illness
  • disease
  • prevent
  • reduce
  • health
  • care
  • cost
  • spend
  • money
  • policy
  • government
  • air
  • water
  • soil
  • damp
  • mold
  • crowding
  • housing
  • buildings
  • rules
  • plan
  • fund
  • benefit
  • risk
  • evidence
  • example
  • long‑term
  • short‑term
  • priority
  • balanced
  • environment
  • safety
  • well‑being
  • life
  • work
  • public
  • policy
  • economic
  • budget
  • invest
  • infrastructure
  • promotion
  • prevention
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