Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Recently, many
people
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have suggested that increasing the price of sugary
foods
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and beverages could help reduce
health
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problems. I agree with
this
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statement because raising the cost of these products would limit the number of
people
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who buy them. Another reason is that
this
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policy could
also
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help decrease
health
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risks in the community,
such
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as diabetes and obesity.
To begin
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with, sugary
foods
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and beverages are now available almost everywhere, making them easily accessible to
people
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. When governments implement
such
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rules, they can greatly influence
people
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’s purchasing habits and reduce
health
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risks in the community,
such
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as diabetes, heart disease, and obesity.
Furthermore
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,
this
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could help build a healthier society free from preventable diseases and encourage
people
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to eat more nutritious food.
For instance
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, a magazine in the UK reported that the number of
people
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suffering from obesity has increased
as a result
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of consuming
foods
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high in sugar.
Although
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increasing the cost of sugary food brings several advantages, it
also
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poses certain drawbacks that may affect the country and
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therefore
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, therefore
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, should not be overlooked. Many families depend on cheap processed food, so if the government raises the prices, it could have a negative impact on them. In
such
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a case, healthier alternatives should be provided at a reasonable price to encourage a healthy lifestyle. In conclusion,
Igree
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I
stronglly
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strongly
raising the price of sugary
foods
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and beverages is a practical way to reduce sugar consumption and improve public
health
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.
However
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, the government should
also
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ensure that affordable and healthy alternatives are available for low-income families.

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task response
Improve task response by giving more strong evidence and clearer conclusions. Add one or two exact facts or numbers to back up points.
coherence
Improve coherence and cohesion by making each paragraph have a clear main idea and link sentences from one idea to the next with connectors.
language
Use stronger and more varied examples, but keep language simple. Also fix spelling and grammar mistakes.
content
Clear position is stated in the introduction and kept in every paragraph.
structure
Good organization: introduction, body, and conclusion present.
language
Effective use of linking phrases like 'To begin with' and 'Furthermore'.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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