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Band 6.5

Some people think that importing movies and TV programmes from other countries is better for country . Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #movies #tv #programmes #countries #country
It is thought that it would be beneficial for a
country
's
culture
 to welcome international artworks, particularly
films
 and television programmes.
While
 certain individuals believe it is essential for
such
 art to be created domestically. I am more inclined to the latter as it is essential for the
country
 to boost their tradition through their own resources. On the one hand, foreign
movies
 and soap operas indirectly pave the way for the formation of civilization.
Firstly
, it enables possibilities for progressive thinking.
Movies
 are mostly the reflection of a society's
culture
 and by watching
films
 from different regions, people are confronted with multiple perspectives
as well as
 values.
Thus
, individuals can be exposed to new
ideals
Correct your spelling
ideas
show examples
 and develop a better way of life.
Besides
 that,
films
 have more acceptance and accessibility among people compared to books and literature.
This
 is because, more and more individuals are increasingly dependent on online platforms like Netflix, Amazon
prime
Capitalize word
Prime
show examples
, etc to watch and enjoy foreign works.
On the other hand
, it is imperative to ensure that
movies
 and other TV shows are produced within the
country
. Even though
movies
 are an expression of art, it is
also
 providing livelihood to many artists and background workers.
Due to
 the high competition from the movie industry abroad, it is often difficult for
native
Correct article usage
the native
show examples
 film fraternity to withstand and survive
such
 a degree of competitiveness.
This
 could affect the economic stability of those depending on
this
 industry as their sole income.
In addition
,
culture
 could only be best described in the context and background of its origin. Language as a medium, could
also
 aid in
this
 process. When it is produced externally, we might fail to imbibe all the essence of our
culture
 in it. In conclusion, it is better to develop
films
 and TV programs within the national boundaries to promote and protect
culture
 as I believe the customs and traditions of a
country
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 only be ideally demonstrated through their own artists, language and perspectives.
Submitted by yuvrajsinghsaggu200703 on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses both sides of the argument and presents a clear stance. To improve, ensure that all points are fully developed with specific examples and evidence to support your views.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with paragraphs addressing different points. Ensure each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea of the paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Maintain logical flow by using transitional sentences and connectors that convey relationships between ideas more explicitly.
task achievement
The introduction clearly presents two sides of the debate and states your position.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main argument and reinforces your stance.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural exchange
  • mutual understanding
  • economic benefits
  • cost-effective
  • extensive crew
  • expensive technology
  • importation and distribution sectors
  • diverse genres
  • storytelling techniques
  • healthy competition
  • talent recognition
  • collaborations
  • preserving local culture
  • promoting
  • employment opportunities
  • logistics
  • hospitality
  • equipment rental
  • national identity
  • pride
  • sense of belonging
  • community
  • creative control
  • cultural nuances
  • societal norms
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