IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that children should not be given homework every day , while others belive that they must get homework everyday in order to be succesful at school.Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Whilst some people
debating
Wrong verb form
debate
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for
Change preposition
to
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 decrease the amount of
homework
Use synonyms
 for pupils and make their school life easier,
In
Fix capitalization
in
show examples
 my opinion, doing
homework
Use synonyms
 on
regular
Correct article usage
a regular
show examples
 basis is essential for better education. On the one hand, less
homework
Use synonyms
 can actually reduce stress
since
Change preposition
apply
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and give more free time for
children
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,
that
Correct word choice
so that
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 they can spend doing some activities they like,
for
Linking Words
example
Punctuation problem
example,
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 hobbies or going out with their friends. Doing their favourite things can make
children
Use synonyms
 happier and calmer. School time is already stressful enough
due to
Linking Words
 the pressure that comes from teachers and parents, so make it easier with removing some
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of
homework
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 may sound like a good idea.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, constantly doing study tasks at home significantly improves learning.
Homework
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 gives students a possibility to check themselves on how good they
had
Wrong verb form
have
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 understood what they have learned with
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
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 and
Correct word choice
whether are
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are they
Correct word order
they are
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 capable of doing some tasks on
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 own, without any help. During
this
Linking Words
process
Add a comma
process,
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children
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 can find some parts that they could misinterpret, skip or forget. In my country
lessons
Punctuation problem
, lessons
show examples
 in school focus more on explaining
some
Correct determiner usage
a
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 topic and lack
practice
Correct article usage
a practice
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 part, so the second one
left
Verb problem
is left
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 to be done at home. And because only practice can show whether
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 have understood
lesson
Correct article usage
the lesson
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 or not, doing
homework
Use synonyms
 every time after learning new material is so important. In conclusion, though reducing stress can be achieved
with
Change preposition
by
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 giving less
homework
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,
i
Fix capitalization
I
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 find that it is more
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 for
children
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 to have
quality
Correct article usage
a quality
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 education,
that
Correct word choice
which
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 only everyday
homework
Use synonyms
 can provide.

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development
The ideas are not all well built. Add more clear and full steps to each point.
coherence
Use better links to show contrast and order, like 'but','however','for example','in conclusion'.
grammar
Fix errors in grammar and form, use small and clear sentences.
task response
Clear view and use of two sides
coherence
There is an introduction and a conclusion
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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