In many large cities, people have to spend hours driving in heavy traffic every day. What are the effects of this on society and the individual? What can be done about it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In large cities like Bangkok, which is one of the most populous and rapidly expanding cities, there are various significant social issues, but the most serious issue is
traffic
congestion
, which negatively affects society and individuals. In the following paragraphs, the
problems
caused by heavy
traffic
will be discussed, and potential solutions will be provided.
To begin
with,
traffic
congestion
not only contributes to an increase in air pollution but
also
exacerbates public health
problems
. High concentrations of pollutants
such
as carbon monoxide and nitrogen oxide from vehicle emissions lead to poor air quality.
Furthermore
, these pollutants have been linked to respiratory illnesses and other diseases in the general population, especially among the elderly, which can lead to increased mortality.
Additionally
, frequent
traffic
jams can disrupt emergency services, delaying ambulances, fire trucks, or police vehicles, which can result in adverse outcomes during critical situations.
Furthermore
, the city's economy is negatively impacted by
congestion
in many ways. Businesses suffer when employees face long commutes, leading to lower productivity and increased operational costs. Tourists are deterred by
congestion
, which reduces revenue for local businesses.
Moreover
, constant pollution and
traffic
jams contribute to a lower quality of life, making the city less attractive to both tourists and residents. For individuals living in a big city,
this
congestion
can significantly affect their daily lives. Spending several hours stuck in
traffic
each day reduces the time available for personal activities or family life, which
also
decreases
overall
well-being and mental health. Financial
problems
are another concern; extended commuting time increases the cost of fuel, and wear and tear from constant
traffic
can
also
lead to higher vehicle maintenance costs.
Additionally
, the stress and mental health issues arising from financial strain can be severe.
To conclude
,
traffic
problems
have far-reaching effects, increasing personal costs and declining society's well-being. The government should implement policies to improve the quality of public transportation so that the number of personal cars can be reduced, thereby addressing and potentially solving these
problems
.
Submitted by sippakorn.wet on

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task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples or data to further bolster your main points. For instance, mentioning specific statistics about pollution levels or commute times can make your argument more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing smoother transitions between paragraphs. While each argument is clear, some connections between points could be strengthened to improve the overall flow.
task achievement
The essay provides a thorough response to the prompt, addressing both the effects of traffic congestion and potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
The introduction effectively sets up the issue, and the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points while offering a solution.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with each paragraph focused on a specific aspect of the problem, contributing to a clear and logical structure.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • congestion
  • cardiovascular diseases
  • idling vehicles
  • greenhouse gases
  • urban sprawl
  • road rage
  • leisure activities
  • economic consequences
  • productivity
  • public transportation
  • emissions
  • quality of life
  • fuel consumption
  • environmental damage
  • stress and anxiety
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