The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013.

The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013.
The diagram illustrates global
sales
Use synonyms
of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013, Units measured in millions.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in 2009,
Nokia
Use synonyms
held the lead with close to 435
m
Correct your spelling
million
phones sold, in 2nd place was
Samsung
Use synonyms
with close to 235
m
Correct your spelling
million
units sold, and in 3rd place was LG with close to 125
m
Correct your spelling
million
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, ZTE with less than 80m, and
lastly
Linking Words
Apple with less than 25m.
Secondly
Linking Words
, in 2011,
Nokia
Use synonyms
's
sales
Use synonyms
decreased to 425m , but still the highest,
Samsung
Use synonyms
saw a significant rise close to 325m,
while
Linking Words
LG's
sales
Use synonyms
decayed to 90m
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
On the other hand
Linking Words
, ZTE saw a slight gain close to 75m
Last
Linking Words
but not least , Apple with a big hike close to 100m.
Secondly
Linking Words
, in 2013,
Samsung
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
skyrocketed to 450m, followed it
Nokia
Use synonyms
with a big decrease close to 255m, and Apple with a massive increase reaching less than 155m, and LG
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
saw a decrease in all years reaching less than 80m
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Finally
Linking Words
, ZTE saw a small increase in its number reaching less than 75m.
To sum up
Linking Words
, in
Nokia
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's first year , they were top 1 , but in the other 2
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
, they decreased.
While
Linking Words
Samsung
Use synonyms
is the opposite, it was
2nd
Change preposition
in 2nd
show examples
place in its first year , but in the other 2 years it significantly increased , becoming the 1st top seller.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "secondly, while".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, nokia, m, samsung with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Global sales
  • Mobile phone brands
  • Market share
  • Trends
  • Growth
  • Decline
  • Technological advancements
  • Innovation
  • Consumer preferences
  • Demographics
  • Market dominance
  • Brand loyalty
  • Comparative analysis
  • Sales figures
  • Data interpretation
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