IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Malnutrition is still a significant problem in many developing countries. What are the causes of malnutrition, and how can this problem be addressed?

Now a days
Use the right word
Nowadays
show examples
, many people are suffering from malnutrition
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it is increasing rapidly in many countries. It is caused because of inadequate nutrients supplied to the body.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the causes and solutions for
this
Linking Words
 deadly disease. The underlying cause
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 problem is
poor
Correct article usage
a poor
show examples
 diet.
In addition
Linking Words
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
suffer
Correct subject-verb agreement
suffers
show examples
 from
this
Linking Words
 because of
less
Correct word choice
a smaller
show examples
 amount of healthy items consumed,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 has
adverse
Correct article usage
an adverse
show examples
 effect
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 immunity.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, another major reason is poverty
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 many poor families cannot afford
Correct article usage
a high-nutrional
show examples
high-nutrional
Replace the word
high-nutrient
show examples
 diet routines
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 leads to stress and different health hazards.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in today's world, there is
constant
Correct article usage
a constant
show examples
 rise in adulterated food items like milk and dairy products.
For example
Linking Words
, in India, not only famous brands like
chitale
Fix capitalization
Chitale
show examples
 and
amul
Fix capitalization
Amul
show examples
 have found
out
Change preposition
apply
show examples
excessive chemicals
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
also
Linking Words
 paneer is highly processed
Punctuation problem
, that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 creates concern amongst the citizens and risk of food
poisoining
Correct your spelling
poisoning
. One of
viable
Correct article usage
the viable
show examples
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
 to mitigate
this
Linking Words
 disorder is to inculcate high
protien
Correct your spelling
protein
, minerals and
calcium rich
Use the right word
calcium-rich
show examples
 articles. As
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsible human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
, we should spread awareness and
organize
Change the spelling
organise
show examples
 camps on
regular
Correct article usage
a regular
show examples
 basis. The best remedy is to eat fruits and vegetables in
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 raw form and
drinking
Wrong verb form
drink
show examples
 lots of water.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and higher authorities should take
Correct article usage
the initiatives
show examples
initiatives
Fix the agreement mistake
initiative
show examples
 to provide free treatment.
For instance
Linking Words
, in
Maharastra
Use the right word
Maharashtra
show examples
, physicians
offers
Correct subject-verb agreement
offer
show examples
 free
check up
Use the right word
check-ups
show examples
 and medicines to malnutrition patients
Punctuation problem
, that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 not only ensures good health but
aslo
Correct your spelling
also
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
show examples
 to
nation's
Correct article usage
the nation's
show examples
 welfare. In summary, as the primary reason for
this
Linking Words
 critical illness is food products
Change preposition
apply
show examples
whereas
Linking Words
, one should take multivitamins and other
suppliments
Correct your spelling
supplements
 in order to cure from it. In my view, researchers should find the multiple options that help people to heal
this
Linking Words
disoder
Correct your spelling
disorder
.

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grammar
Check spelling and grammar to improve accuracy and readability.
structure
Plan your answer with a clear outline: intro, causes, solutions, conclusion.
task
Keep to the task and avoid extra claims; explain how malnutrition can be addressed in real ways.
content
Use more evidence or facts, and give more clear examples of solutions.
cohesion
Use simple connect words to link ideas, and keep ideas in logical order.
structure
The essay has a clear layout with sections on causes and solutions.
content
Some real world examples are used to show points.
task
The writer tries to give remedies and steps to help.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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