Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. why do many working people not get enough exercise? what can be done about this problem?

An enormous amount of
people
have been challenging their health by avoiding
exercise
on a daily basis.
This
essay
will discuss the main causes why
people
do not regularly
exercise
including the long working hours and commuting.
This
essay
will
also
suggest solutions including maintaining a healthy lifestyle with a work-life balance. Time constraints
due to
long working hours and commuting lead to fatigue, leaving little energy for
exercise
. Since
people
have high professional commitments, spend most of their time at the workplace.
For instance
, the workforce has a more hectic routine ever than before. In some cases, employees have been working for 16 hours a day.
First,
to socialise with colleagues to get familiar with each other.
Next,
meeting deadlines for their tasks.
Then
, learning new skills relevant to one domain.
In addition
, it is hard to find someone who commutes either on foot or cycle.
Hence
, higher
career
goals exacerbate our physical activities.
People
need to schedule a sustainable routine.
Although
career
is a competitive domain,
people
should take health into consideration. It is possible to opt for
exercise
while
progressing in a
career
.
For example
, many multinational companies like GOOGLE have on-site gyms that employees regularly utilize for well-being.
Moreover
,
although
dilemmas are there because of gym subscription charges, walking, jogging, and running can help to
exercise
.
Therefore
,
prioritising
Change preposition
by prioritising
show examples
health,
people
can focus on physical activities
along with
their mundane goals. In summary,
this
essay
discussed spending much more time at the workplace and commuting methods deteriorate physical activities.
this
essay
suggested managing workouts
along with
a
career
.
Submitted by Haris Khan on

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Task Achievement
To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that both parts of the prompt are fully addressed with balanced detail. While your essay discusses causes and solutions, more specific examples and a wider range of solutions could enrich this part. Consider introducing varied examples from different sectors or personal life adjustments that encourage exercise.
Coherence & Cohesion
For improving Coherence and Cohesion, focus on linking your ideas more seamlessly. You've structured your essay well; however, using a wider array of linking words and phrases can enhance the flow between ideas. Additionally, consider varying sentence structures to provide a more engaging read.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Time constraints
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Passive leisure activities
  • Workplace wellness programs
  • Active commuting
  • Subsidized
  • Public awareness
  • Health benefits
  • Incentivizing
  • Accessible public spaces
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