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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that the ability to compete with others for a successful career is more important. Others believe that the ability to work with others as a team is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the contemporary workplace, there have been considerable discussions about the relationships among employees. To be more specific, whether cooperation or
competition
Use synonyms
 should be prioritised remains a subject of intense debate. Proponents of
competition
Use synonyms
 in the workplace highlight that
this
Linking Words
 approach to work accelerates personal advancement. The environment of
competition
Use synonyms
 can positively affect an individual’s mindset and behaviour: fostering strong motivations, driving them to refine skills and endeavouring to increase productivity. These changes are more likely to make the person be recognised and rewarded,
therefore
Linking Words
 contributing to instant personal career growth.
For example
Linking Words
, a teacher participating in a delivery
competition
Use synonyms
 is going to devote immense time and energy to perfecting slides, practising expression,
as well as
Linking Words
 innovating class activities. Once he wins, he can get promoted, and his income can
also
Linking Words
 increase in accordance.
While
Linking Words
competition
Use synonyms
 can lead to immediate personal success, some people still maintain that collaboration is more significant. One paramount reason for
this
Linking Words
 view is that cooperations, particularly those in complex schemes, create a special environment where participants can conveniently and comfortably communicate and interact with each other, which is beneficial to the free and efficient flow of knowledge and resources. These adequate communications can trigger a great deal of creativity, and
this
Linking Words
 is a strong force in organisational advance.
For instance
Linking Words
, a superior treatment for a patient may stem from interdisciplinary doctors rather than only one professional mastering a specific domain. In conclusion, I tend to posit that
competition
Use synonyms
 is conducive to personal development,
while
Linking Words
 cooperation has advantageous effects on complicated projects in a company.

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task response
Make your view clear in the end. State if you agree with one side before you end.
coherence
Add one or two strong ideas in each part and link them to the view.
structure
Use a clear topic sentence for each paragraph. Start with the view and then explain.
examples
Give more real work life examples that fit the idea you talk about.
grammar
Check the grammar and keep to short, plain sentences.
lexical
Use common words only; avoid hard words.
accuracy
Be careful with tense and pronoun use.
strength
Clear view on the topic and a end stance.
strength
Good link of two views in one talk with a conclusion.
strength
Some good examples to back points.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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