IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people argue that public libraries have become unnecessary because nowadays information can be accessed from home using the internet . Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages

In the modern world, the issue of public
libraries
Use synonyms
 has become increasingly important and frequently discussed across different social and academic contexts.
People
Use synonyms
 hold various and often conflicting views on the uselessness of
libraries
Use synonyms
 compared to the internet, which makes
this
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 topic highly relevant today.
This
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 essay will examine the main aspects of the debate and present a clear and balanced conclusion.
To begin
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 with, one significant point that should be considered is that
people
Use synonyms
 can read books from anywhere on the internet.
This
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 is mainly because everyone has a phone and internet, which often leads to less reading from
libraries
Use synonyms
 for individuals, communities, or even entire countries.
For example
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, several recent cases have shown that more and more individuals prefer to read from phones rather than going to the library, clearly demonstrating how
this
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 factor influences the broader situation.
Moreover
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,
this
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 trend tends to create additional long-term effects.
Therefore
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, it becomes evident that availability is an essential part of the
overall
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 discussion. Another important aspect that deserves attention is that reading from a phone can not set the mood. The key reason for
this
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 is that
people
Use synonyms
 lose focus when they read, and
this
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 can directly affect students preparing for exams. A relevant example can be observed in students who study in universities or colleges, where many
people
Use synonyms
 have experienced successful preparation for the final exam because they can spend more time preparing and do not lose focus every four or five minutes.
Furthermore
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,
this
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 situation may lead to wider consequences that influence social or educational development.
As a result
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, it becomes clear that public
libraries
Use synonyms
 may be useful to keep focusing on study , and
that
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
 must
also
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 be considered when evaluating the issue. In conclusion, the arguments examined show that public
libraries
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 are useful but are not available
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 everyone.
Although
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 opinions differ, I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and
this
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 topic will remain important in the future.

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Task response
Be clear on the main view at the start and keep it through the whole essay. All ideas should show this view. Add one stronger point for and one point against with simple, real examples.
Coherence and cohesion
Make each section have one main idea. Begin with a clear topic sentence. Use simple sign posts like first, next, then, but, however, and finally to guide the reader.
Task response
The essay deals with the topic and has an introduction, body and conclusion.
Coherence and cohesion
There are attempts to connect ideas with words like 'another important' and 'as a result'.
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