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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In developed countries, more and more people buy and use their cars. Do the advantages for people of cars using outweight its disadvantages on environment.

In recent years, there has been growing discussion about the usage of
cars
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 and their impact on the environment.
While
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this
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 trend offers several significant
advantages
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 ,
such
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 as flexibility and convenience, it
also
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 presents certain drawbacks on the atmosphere, which should not be overlooked ,
such
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 as congestion and environmental degradation.
This
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 essay will examine both perspectives before reaching a conclusion. One of the main
advantages
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 of using personal vehicles is that they offer reliability and comfort.
This
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 is because people have access to their own transport, which permits them to travel anywhere regardless of time, providing greater mobility with significant comfort. Another positive aspect is that it makes the journey more comfortable because drivers can enjoy driving by listening to their favourite songs rather than travelling in a bus , which often feels like sardiness in a can.
For example
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, a recent survey revealed that an average of 70% individuals prefer driving over public transport to avoid overcrowding issues , which is very common in public transport, especially during peak hours. Despite these benefits of using
cars
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, they
also
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 have notable disadvantages. One major drawback is that it causes congestion in cities as there are too many personal vehicles on roads, making it impossible to control the traffic, which can negatively affect our environment.
In addition
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 to
this
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, the fumes that are emitted by these vehicles cause air pollution and impact the air quality, which results in serious health issues
such
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 as respiratory problems
,
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apply
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 and Asthma.
As a result
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, it impacts the
overall
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 health and well-being of residents and society. As an example, in 2024, the World Health Organisation reported that the
overall
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 air quality had decreased by 8% compared to the previous reports, and notified governments to take significant measures to control it. In conclusion,
although
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 many people believe that the usage of
cars
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 provides significant
advantages
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 in terms of reliability and comfort, it
also
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 poses challenges , including traffic and environmental issues.
Overall
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, I believe that the disadvantages outweigh the
advantages
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, and the government should take appropriate measures to reduce the number of
cars
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 on roads to prevent society from environmental degradation.

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task response
State your view clearly in the intro and keep it in the body; add more clear reasons and links to support each point.
coherence
Use link words to join ideas smoothly and keep paragraphs focused on one idea.
language
Check grammar and spelling; fix odd phrases and general mistakes to improve accuracy.
structure
Clear introduction of topic and aim.
content
Attempts to discuss both sides of the issue.
structure
Conclusion gives a final view.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenience
  • mobility
  • accessibility
  • economic growth
  • independence
  • urban congestion
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • air pollution
  • health issues
  • sustainability
  • public transportation
  • car-sharing initiatives
  • electric vehicles
  • status
  • quality of life
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