IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

In some cities, public
parks
Use synonyms
 and open spaces are being transformed into gardens where local people can grow fruit and vegetables in their own.
there
Fix capitalization
There
show examples
 are some advantages
outweigh
Correct pronoun usage
that outweigh
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disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
. There are some disadvantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them. Public
parks
Use synonyms
 are places for relaxation
Punctuation problem
. coverting
show examples
coverting
Correct your spelling
Converting
 them into gardens can reduce some entertainment places
such
Linking Words
 as playground areas or
parks
Use synonyms
.
it
Fix capitalization
It
show examples
 may
also
Linking Words
 increase the maintenance work needed, which could be difficult for local authorities. Despite
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 drawbacks, there are more significant
advanmtages
Correct your spelling
advantages
. Gardens not only provide healthy food but
also
Linking Words
 encourage a sense of responsibility and community spirit.
In addition
Linking Words
, people can grow and eat fruit and vegetables that are grown naturally and without chemicals.
Linking Words
this
Fix capitalization
This
show examples
 can improve public health and reduce the cost of buying groceries.
Furtemore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, gardening can bring communities together.
For example
Linking Words
, neighbours can work together,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
 can share.
it
Fix capitalization
It
show examples
also
Linking Words
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
 opportunity for people to spend time outdoors
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is good
physical
Change preposition
for physical
show examples
 and mental health.
in
Fix capitalization
In
show examples
conclusin
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
while
Linking Words
 turning
parks
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
gardening
Fix the agreement mistake
gardens
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 may reduce some recreational space.
the
Fix capitalization
The
show examples
 benefits of fresh food, community building and outdoor activities clearly outweigh the disadvantages

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structure
Work on clear, short sentences. Use side words like first, also, but, then, finally to make idea flow. Avoid long lines.
task
State your main view in the first paragraph and keep a clear path to the end. Make the final line match your view.
language
Check spell and use the right word. Use full stops and capital letters in the right places.
development
Give more full ideas. Say why and how each point is true. Add one small example.
content
The writer shows a view that gardens can bring good food.
content
The writer gives some reasons why people may work together and stay outside.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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