IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that success depends mainly on talent, while others argue that hard work is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that
success
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 depends mainly on
talent
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,
while
Linking Words
 others argue that hard
work
Use synonyms
 is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Some
people
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 believe that
success
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 mainly depends on natural
talent
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. They argue that talented individuals can achieve high results more easily than others.
For example
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, some musicians or athletes show outstanding abilities from a very young age and reach
success
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 faster with less effort. In
this
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 view,
talent
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 gives
people
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 a strong advantage and helps them stand out in competitive fields.
On the other hand
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, many
people
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 believe that hard
work
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 plays a more important role in achieving
success
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. They claim that consistent effort, discipline, and determination can lead to great achievements even without strong natural abilities.
For instance
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, many successful athletes and professionals were not considered talented at
first,
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but through regular practice and hard
work
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, they managed to reach the top in their careers.
In addition
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, hard
work
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 helps
people
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 improve their skills over time.
Talent
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 alone is often not enough if a person does not practice or stay motivated. In education, students who study regularly and manage their time well often perform better than those who rely only on their intelligence. In my opinion,
while
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talent
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 can be helpful, hard
work
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 is more important for long-term
success
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.
Talent
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 may open the door, but hard
work
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 is what keeps a person moving forward. Without effort and dedication, even the most talented individuals may fail to achieve their goals.

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Task Response
Make your view clear at the start. Give two strong points in favor of talent and hard work, then give your final view.
Content
Add more strong examples from real life or from work to back your points.
Coherence
Use a wider set of linking words to show flow between ideas. Words like first, also, however, and finally help.
Coherence
Make sure each idea is well connected to the main topic, and keep the main idea in view in every paragraph.
Grammar
Check small word mistakes and keep sentences simple and easy to read.
Structure
Clear view on the topic and a clear ending.
Content
Ideas are supported by examples.
Coherence
Linking words help the flow of the essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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