IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The internet is an amazing invention which has changed the world. Some say it is for the better and some say it is for the worst. Give the advantages and disadvantages of the internet.

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Introduction
Nowdays
Use the right word
Nowadays
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 are using everything
with
Change preposition
on
show examples
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.Some
people
Use synonyms
 can use the
internet
Use synonyms
 in
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 way and some
people
Use synonyms
 not.
Also
Linking Words
,
These
Fix capitalization
these
show examples
genraition
Correct your spelling
generations
cant
Correct your spelling
can't
 live without
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will give the advantages and the
disadvantges
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
 of
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.
Body paragraph 1
ON
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
hand
Correct word choice
other hand
show examples
, there are many
advantges
Correct your spelling
advantages
 of the
internet
Use synonyms
.
First,
Linking Words
women nowadays are always shopping online .
Moreover
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 can buy their
dreeses
Correct your spelling
dresses
while
Linking Words
 thier at home.
Forexample
Correct your spelling
For example
,
people
Use synonyms
just can
Correct word order
can just
show examples
 relax and buy from everywhere. Second ,
stuyding
Correct your spelling
studying
 online is the most important thing
expatioly
Correct your spelling
especially
 for
kids
Use synonyms
.
nowaday
Use the right word
Nowadays
show examples
 there
are
Verb problem
is are
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
lot
 of bad
weathers
Fix the agreement mistake
weather
show examples
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
kids
Use synonyms
 should study online for
thies
Correct your spelling
their
 safety.
Forinst
Correct your spelling
For instance
,
crona fairous
Correct your spelling
Corona virus
 was so
dangeorus
Correct your spelling
dangerous
 that
everey
Correct your spelling
every
 kid had to study online.
Third,
Linking Words
teenagers
Punctuation problem
teenagers,
show examples
this
Linking Words
genraition
Correct your spelling
generation
 are
obbseased
Correct your spelling
obsessed
 with
soical midia
Correct your spelling
social media
. teenagers love to be
trend
Replace the word
trendy
show examples
those
Correct pronoun usage
these
show examples
 days just by doing
somthis
Correct your spelling
something
 fun like
shairing
Correct your spelling
sharing
there
Use the right word
their
show examples
 cooking with
there
Use the right word
their
show examples
 fans
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
 can make
theme
Use the right word
them
show examples
 more confident.
Linking Words
for
Fix capitalization
For
show examples
 example,
kids
Use synonyms
alaways
Correct your spelling
always
 watch some
tiktok
Use the right word
TikTok
show examples
,
snapchat
Fix capitalization
Snapchat
show examples
 and
instagram
Fix capitalization
Instagram
show examples
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 they can get some
informaitons
Correct your spelling
information
 about
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
.
Body paragraph 2
ON
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
hand
Correct word choice
other hand
show examples
 , there are many
disadvantges
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
 of
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.
Linking Words
firstly
Fix capitalization
Firstly
show examples
,
siting
Use the right word
sitting
show examples
 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
soical midia
Correct your spelling
social media
 can
damged
Correct your spelling
damage
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
people's
show examples
maind
Correct your spelling
minds
 and
bad
Verb problem
cause bad
show examples
 health. The
reasones
Correct your spelling
reason
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
kids
Use synonyms
being over
Verb problem
are
show examples
wiegth
Correct your spelling
overweight
 it
due to
Linking Words
kids
Use synonyms
 are just sitting and playing
compeuter
Correct your spelling
computer
 games .
For example
Linking Words
,
kids
Use synonyms
siting
Use the right word
sitting
show examples
 all day on the
internet
Use synonyms
 is very bad for
health
Correct pronoun usage
their health
show examples
.
Second,
Linking Words
hackers
Punctuation problem
hackers,
show examples
 those days are so scary. hackers can hack
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
people's
show examples
 phones just by some calls or
mesage
Correct your spelling
messages
.
Forexample
Correct your spelling
For example
, hackers are the most
deangerous
Correct your spelling
dangerous
 thing
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
internet
Use synonyms
Conclusion
In
conclustion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, there are
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of good things and bad things
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.

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task response
Task response: you touch the topic and give some points, but you do not show a clear view or strong examples. To improve, make one clear opinion in the intro and support it with two or three simple ideas. Give brief examples for each idea, and finish with a short conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: your writing has three blocks, but the ideas do not link well. Use a clear opening sentence, one paragraph per main idea, and a closing line. Use simple linking words like first, then, and, but, also, finally.
content
You try to discuss both sides of the topic.
structure
You give some real life ideas about how the internet affects people.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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