177. Some people think competitive sport is important for a child's education. Others think it has negative effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many individuals think competitive sport is crucial for a child's education. Some think that it has negative effects on
kids
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. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both my views
,
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apply
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then
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opinion
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opinions
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, and
lastly
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, I will conclude my topic. Competition is important in
kids
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' lives. Competition plays a crucial role in children's lives to motivate them.
This
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helps to keep them physically and mentally active , which
further
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enhances academic performance. Competitive
sports
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help to build leadership
quality
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qualities
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. If a child plays in a team, it teaches the value of sharing, co-operation, and discipline.
For instance
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, in an ABC newspaper mentioned, ram 9-year-old 10 year
old
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10-year-old
had
a
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apply
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depression, but when
he
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they
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joined
sports
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,
he
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they
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recovered very fast. As he made friends and his interests were devoted towards
sports
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. On the flip side, some argue it creates a harmful impact on
kids
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' lives. With too much competing thinking kid can develop stress, anxiety, and depression.
This
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will create a negative effect on
child
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children's
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education. Sometimes , after losing continuously
kid
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, kid
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may feel very demotivated and can lose their self-interest.
Moreover
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, being willing to win every time creates pressure on
kids
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. From my perspective,
kids
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should have
value
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the value
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of winning a match. So
,
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apply
show examples
that they know how to play better each time.
This
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can make them responsible and more valued in their sport. Parents and teachers play a key role in ensuring that
sports
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remain a positive experience.
To conclude
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, I would say competition is important
but
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, but
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to a limited extent. There should be good values like teamwork rather than winning a game. If a kid always thinks of winning every match,
this
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makes them jealous of their opponents. They may not be able to enjoy the game

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grammar
Fix mistakes in sentence form. Use short, clear sentences. Check grammar and spellings so ideas are easy to read.
content
Give real and clear examples to back each point. Some parts come from no real facts.
structure
Close with a strong end by restating your view and sum up the main reasons.
task response
The essay shows both sides and your own view.
coherence
Good use of linking words to move from one idea to the next.
structure
Clear plan with intro, body and conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Teamwork
  • Cooperation
  • Communication skills
  • Physical fitness
  • Obesity
  • Discipline
  • Time management
  • Confidence
  • Resilience
  • Anxiety
  • Burnout
  • Mental health
  • Risk of injury
  • Safety measures
  • Academic responsibilities
  • Participation
  • Unhealthy rivalries
  • Aggression
  • Sportsmanship
  • Jealousy
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