IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Teachers are more influential than parents in shaping a child's future. Do you agree or disagree

Currently, many people believe that
teachers
Use synonyms
 have a strong impact on children’s future. They are more
effect them
Replace the word
effective
show examples
 than
parents
Use synonyms
 said others. I
partialy
Correct your spelling
partially
 agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
 essay depicts my own opinion and view. On the one hand,
teachers
Use synonyms
 help them develop their
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 and knowledge. Children spend their time at school
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
teachers
Use synonyms
 teach them critical thinking and choose
career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
.
Especially
Punctuation problem
Especially,
show examples
 they give more
instruction
Fix the agreement mistake
instructions
show examples
 on selecting a future job. They overcome challenges with students.
For instance
Linking Words
, at
school
Add a comma
school,
show examples
 there are many science subjects like physics, chemistry, and biology
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
 difficult.
However
Linking Words
, Instructors help them solve many formulas and
theory
Fix the agreement mistake
theories
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, others think that
parents
Use synonyms
 have a deeper
influnce
Correct your spelling
influence
 on
child’s
Fix the agreement mistake
children’s
show examples
 care,
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
, and development. From a young age
children
Punctuation problem
, children
show examples
always
Verb problem
are always
show examples
together with
Linking Words
 their family.Their moms and dads support them more than
teachers
Use synonyms
. They understood them because of the fact that their children
close
Verb problem
were close
show examples
 to them.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
teachers
Use synonyms
 play
crucial
Correct article usage
a crucial
show examples
 role in
child’s
Correct article usage
a child’s
show examples
 education and ambition.
Parents
Use synonyms
 are more
influental
Correct your spelling
influential
 in their character and
value
Fix the agreement mistake
values
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, some people sometimes choose one. In my view,
child’s
Correct article usage
a child’s
show examples
 future depends on both
parents
Use synonyms
 and
teachers
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task
Be clear on the main idea at the start and keep this view in the whole essay.
coherence
Make each paragraph focus on one main idea and add clear links between ideas.
grammar
Check spell and word form; fix common errors like influence, much more, and use of and.
content
The writer makes a view and ends with a balance idea.
development
There are ideas on how teachers and parents help a child.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: