IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Whether or not someone achieves their aims in life is mostly a question of luck? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that when someone achieves
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
goal
Punctuation problem
goal,
show examples
he is having
Wrong verb form
they have
show examples
 a sort of luck. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 we will discuss how people think
if
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
 someone
achieved
Verb problem
has achieved
show examples
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
goals
Use synonyms
. People have to know that if someone achieved his
goal
Punctuation problem
goal,
show examples
 that doesn'
t
Use synonyms
 mean that he is lucky
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
well
Punctuation problem
well,
show examples
 he can be a bit lucky sometimes
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 not all the time.
Goals
Use synonyms
 can'
t
Use synonyms
 be achieved by just how lucky you are.
Goals
Use synonyms
 are achieved by how hard work you
made
Verb problem
put in
show examples
 to achieve that goal.
For example
Linking Words
, a person wants to have
muscles
Use synonyms
he
Punctuation problem
, he
show examples
 can'
t
Use synonyms
 just sleep and dream of having
muscles
Use synonyms
, he
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 to go to the gym and
workout
Use the right word
work out
show examples
 to have the
muscles
Use synonyms
 that he is dreaming of
, he
Punctuation problem
. He
show examples
 can be a bit lucky for having good genes, but
also
Linking Words
worked
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
 hard to build
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
muscles
Use synonyms
. Luck
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 not always work, sometimes you
maybe
Use the right word
may be
show examples
 having a bad day, will you just be
laying
Use the right word
lying
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the couch and just scrolling
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 your phone. No, you have to work to achieve what you are wishing for.
However
Linking Words
, occasionally you will
be having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 a good day at least once a week or twice a week if you are lucky. Achieving
goals
Use synonyms
not
Verb problem
is not
show examples
 all about luck, you don'
t
Use synonyms
 know how the person worked or what he is doing in his life to be that good."
DONT
Correct your spelling
DON'T
 JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER".

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task response
Add a clear view on the topic in one line in the first part so the reader knows your view from the start.
coherence
Make each para have one main idea. Start with a topic sentence and finish with a short idea that links to the next para.
coherence
Use simple linking words like 'also', 'but', 'however', 'so' to help flow from one idea to the next.
task response
Give stronger or more steady examples. Explain how each example shows the idea more fully.
task response
End with a clear closing line that repeats your view and sums up the points you made.
content
Your idea that luck is not the only thing and that hard work matters is clear.
example
You use an example about gym work which shows the idea well.
stance
You keep the topic close to the question and say what you think.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • aims
  • determination
  • resilience
  • opportunities
  • effort
  • planning
  • unpredictability
  • innovation
  • perseverance
  • perception
  • sustainability
  • adaptation
  • networking
  • initiative
  • random chance
What to do next:
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