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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that money is the best gift to give teenagers, while others disagree. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving money as a gift? What is your opinion?

In the modern world, it is undeniable that
gift
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-giving plays an important role in strengthening relationships, especially between adults and
teenagers
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. Some people believe that
money
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 is the best
gift
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 for
teenagers
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,
while
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 others disagree with
this
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 view. In
this
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 essay, an attempt will be made to examine both the advantages and disadvantages of giving
money
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 as a
gift
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. On the one hand, there are several benefits associated with giving
money
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 to
teenagers
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. One of the most apparent advantages is flexibility, as it allows recipients to choose items that truly suit their personal interests and needs. To illustrate,
teenagers
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 often have diverse preferences that adults may not fully understand.
For instance
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, receiving
money
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 enables them to purchase educational materials, clothing, or technological devices that they genuinely value.
On the other hand
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, there are
also
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 some drawbacks related to giving
money
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 as a
gift
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 that should not be overlooked. One negative aspect is that it may reduce the emotional significance of
gift
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-giving and encourage materialistic attitudes. To clarify,
money
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 lacks personal meaning and may be spent carelessly.
For example
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,
teenagers
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 might use cash gifts on unnecessary items rather than saving or investing
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 wisely, which limits the long-term value of the
gift
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. To recapitulate, it is evident that the main merit of giving
money
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 is its convenience and freedom of choice,
while
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 the principal downside is the lack of emotional value and potential misuse. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that
money
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 can be a practical
gift
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 for
teenagers
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, but it should ideally be combined with guidance or thoughtful presents in order to provide both financial flexibility and meaningful support.

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overall
Anchor your view in a clear stance and give a brief reason at the end of the introduction to guide the reader. Add more specific examples that relate to teen life and money, such as saving for books, apps, or courses. Use a simple, direct closing sentence.
structure
Clear structure with introduction, two body paragraphs and conclusion.
coherence
Use of 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' to show both sides.
argument
The position is stated in the final paragraph.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial responsibility
  • budget
  • save
  • informed spending decisions
  • personal preferences
  • practical and efficient
  • unwanted or inappropriate gifts
  • impersonal
  • emotional value
  • thoughtfulness
  • personal consideration
  • wise financial decisions
  • frivolously
  • lasting memories and experiences
  • educational courses
  • hobby-related equipment
  • long-lasting positive impact
  • fostering interests and skills
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