Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology?

Modern
technology
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is now everywhere in most workplaces. Almost every job today uses computers, the internet, or some kind of digital system. I think
technology
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has changed the way we
work
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in many big ways. It makes
work
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faster and easier, but at the same
time
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, I
also
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think there are some disadvantages if we rely on it too much. First of all,
technology
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has made communication much
more simple
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simpler
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. In the past,
people
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had to send letters or talk
face to face
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face-to-face
show examples
. Now we can send emails, text messages, or have online meetings in just a few seconds. Workers can
also
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work
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from home because of video calls and online platforms.
This
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saves
time
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and money.
For example
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, many companies now use apps to manage projects and share documents, so everyone can see the information at the same
time
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. Because of
this
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,
work
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becomes more
organized
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organised
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and faster than before. Another big change is productivity. Machines and software can do tasks that used to take many hours.
For example
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, data can be calculated quickly by computers
instead
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of
doing
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being
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it by hand. Factories
also
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use robots to produce products faster and with
less
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fewer
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mistakes.
This
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helps companies earn more profit and reduce costs. In my opinion,
technology
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really
improve
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improves
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efficiency in most jobs.
However
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, there are
also
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some disadvantages. One problem is that
people
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may become too dependent on
technology
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. If the system crashes or there is no internet, many companies cannot continue their
work
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.
This
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can cause stress and big losses.
Also
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, some workers may lose their jobs because machines replace them.
This
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is especially common in factories or simple office jobs. Another disadvantage is that
people
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sometimes lose basic skills.
For example
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, many
people
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do not remember phone numbers anymore because everything is saved in their phones. Some workers
also
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have less face-to-face communication, which can make relationships weaker. Working online all the
time
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can make
people
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feel isolated and tired. In conclusion, modern
technology
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has changed the workplace in positive and negative ways. It makes
work
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faster, easier, and more connected. But if we depend too much on it, we may face problems like job loss, technical failures, and weaker human skills. I believe we should use
technology
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in a balanced way, not let it control our whole working life.

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strength
Your plan is clear and you give both a good and bad side. The end has your view, which is good.
advice
Add more exact facts or numbers to back each point.
grammar
Fix small grammar errors, like 'improve' -> 'improves' to match the subject.
coherence
Use simple linking words (and, but, because, also, however, so) to connect ideas smoothly.
structure
Separate ideas into clear blocks. Start a new paragraph for each big idea.
content
Give a short plan at the start or end to show how we can use tech in a balanced way.
structure
You make the main idea clear in all paragraphs.
content
Examples of how tech helps (remote work, robots) are used.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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