IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

What are the advantages and disadvantages of social media?

In today's
globalized
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globalised
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 world, the issue of social
media
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 has become increasingly prevalent. It is a subject of heated debate, with some individuals
emphasizing
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emphasising
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 the numerous benefits associated with it,
while
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 others highlight its potential drawbacks.
This
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 essay will explore both perspectives, weighing the merits and disadvantages, before presenting my own viewpoint.
To begin
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 with, assessing whether social
media
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 is advantageous requires careful analysis. Many argue that social
media
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 plays an indispensable role in contemporary society, influencing social, moral, and economic aspects.
For instance
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, it fosters innovation and enhances
quality
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the quality
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 of life. A report by The Daily Star revealed that over 80% of individuals experienced notable improvements in their standard of living
due to
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 social
media
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, highlighting its importance in modern life.
However
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, opponents contend that social
media
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also
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 comes with its own set of challenges. They argue that it is responsible for several negative consequences that affect not only society at large but
also
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 individual well-being. One major concern is the potential harm caused by social
media
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, which could lead to long-term global issues
such
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 as increased inequality or environmental degradation.
Therefore
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, it is essential to carefully evaluate these drawbacks before fully embracing its advantages. In conclusion, social
media
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 has both significant advantages and notable disadvantages.
While
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 the negative aspects cannot be ignored, I firmly believe that the benefits of social
media
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 in today's world are substantial and essential for progress.
Nevertheless
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, a balanced approach is crucial to ensure that the positive effects are
maximized
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maximised
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while
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minimizing
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minimising
show examples
 potential harm.

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task response
Answer both sides in a more clear way. Show more real good points and bad points of social media.
task response
Give more direct examples, not general claims. The one report feels weak and not very clear.
task response
Explain your own view more fully. Now your ideas are a bit broad.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, middle, and end, but the main ideas need more support.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. Some parts sound formal but do not add much meaning.
coherence and cohesion
Make each body paragraph focus on one main point, then explain it with an example.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and a clear conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow in general.
task response
You answer the question and talk about both good and bad sides.
task response
Your tone is formal and fits an IELTS essay.
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