IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

As cities expand, governments should look forward to creating better networks of public transport available for everyone rather than building more roads for vehicle owning population. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As cities continue to expand,
transportation
Use synonyms
 becomes an increasingly important issue. Some people argue that governments should focus on developing better public
transport
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 systems for everyone rather than building more roads for private car owners. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 view because efficient public
transportation
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 can reduce
traffic
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 congestion, protect the environment, and improve accessibility for all citizens.
First,
Linking Words
improving public
transport
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 networks can significantly decrease
traffic
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 congestion. When buses, trains, and subways are reliable, affordable, and convenient, more people are likely to use them
instead
Linking Words
 of driving their own cars.
As a result
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, fewer vehicles will be on the road, which can help reduce
traffic
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 jams and make commuting faster and less stressful for everyone.
Second,
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investing in public
transportation
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 is more environmentally friendly. Private vehicles produce large amounts of air pollution and greenhouse gases, which contribute to climate change and poor air quality.
In contrast
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, modern public
transport
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 systems,
such
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 as electric trains or buses, can carry many passengers at once
while
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 producing fewer emissions.
This
Linking Words
 helps create cleaner and healthier cities.
Furthermore
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, public
transport
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 provides equal opportunities for people who do not own cars, including students, elderly individuals, and low-income residents. By expanding
transportation
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 networks, governments can ensure that everyone has access to jobs, education, and essential services. In conclusion,
while
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 building more roads may provide short-term solutions for
traffic
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 problems, developing efficient public
transport
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 systems offers long-term benefits.
Therefore
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, governments should
prioritize
Change the spelling
prioritise
show examples
 improving public
transportation
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 to create more sustainable, accessible, and livable cities for the growing population.

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task response
For task response, add one more clear side, such as why more roads do not fix the problem for a long time.
task response
For task response, use one real or simple example to make your ideas stronger.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, link ideas with a few more words like for example, however, and because.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, make one body part a little more full so each main point has equal support.
task response
For task response, you answer the question clearly and your opinion is strong from start to end.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, the essay has a clear start, middle, and end.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, each paragraph has one main idea and the ideas are easy to follow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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