In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes. What are the reasons for this? How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Nowadays,

people

Use synonyms

buy more

clothes

Use synonyms

than they need in some areas of the world. I completely agree that

people

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should reduce the number of

clothes

Use synonyms

they buy. A discussion of the reasons and how to solve

this

Linking Words

issue will be highlighted in the write-up. One of the main reasons for purchasing too much wearings is items are too cheap.

This

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is because many famous clothing brands are advertising new products every season and manufacture the

clothes

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in a large amount caused a lower

price

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This

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trend as known as '' fast-fasion''. Another significant reason is that

people

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are affected by their idols ,TV series or social media. They tend to imitate how celebrities

wear

Verb problem

dress

show examples

For instance

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, my friend at the university is a big fan of K-pop. He wants to look like his idol , so he goes shopping every weekend.

Therefore

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, he bought a lot of cheap

clothes

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, but most of them are in a low-quality.

Finally

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, those items have been thrown out, which is really a waste. I definitely believe

people

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can reduce the quantity of clothing.

Firstly

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, the government should encourage manufacturers to raise both the quality and

price

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. In

this

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way, products can be used for a longer time and decrease

people

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's shopping desire at the same time.

Secondly

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, celebrities can share their idea of being eco-friendly, and

appealing

Replace the word

appeal

to fans who do not buy too many

clothes

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Consequently

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, these methods can persuade

people

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to just buy the wearings which they really need. In conclusion, I firmly believe that buying too many

clothes

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is not a good sign, which resulted by the low

price

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and idols' fashions.

However

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this

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situation can be solved by increasing the quality and

price

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of items and persuading

people

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to stop

this

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behaviour by their idols.

nemo9519590

Mar 17, 2026

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task response

Answer both parts more fully. You explain the reasons well, but the ways to reduce buying need a bit more detail.

task response

Make your main ideas clearer. Some points are good, but a few sentences are hard to follow because of grammar and word choice.

task response

Use more specific support for solutions. For example, explain how schools, shops, or media can help people buy less.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear 4-part structure, which is good. Keep one main idea in each part of the body.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas more smoothly. Use simple links like 'because', 'so', 'also', and 'as a result' in a clear way.

coherence and cohesion

Check sentence order and form. Some lines are not easy to understand, and this hurts flow.

task response

You answer both questions in the task.

task response

You give a real example about your friend, and it fits the topic.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Most ideas stay on topic and connect to the main question.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

clothes
buy
many
few
cheap
price
sale
shop
store
online
trend
fashion
media
ad
pressure
need
plan
budget
waste
reuse
repair
donate
secondhand
wardrobe
closet
space
storage
habit
impulse
choice
decision
quality
value
keep
wear
outgrow
example
experience
I
my
people
world
simple
change
buy less
durable

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In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes. What are the reasons for this? How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Some people think that public health is the responsibility of the government while others think that people should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people say that television is useful for education, while others say it is useful only for entertainment. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by the international fast food. This is having negative effect on our families and societies. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

With advancing technology, the development of automated vehicles is becoming reality. In your opinion, what are the advantages and disadvantages of self-driving vehicles?

The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has transformed the way we live, communicate and do business. Mobile phones can also be the cause of social or medical problems. What forms do these problems take? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of mobile phones?