IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should a learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In today’s world,
this
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 issue is widely discussed. Some people believe that learning
foreign
Correct article usage
a foreign
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language
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 is mainly for travel to or
work
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 in
foreign
Correct article usage
a foreign
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 country,
while
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 others argue that
this
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 is not the only reason to learn
foreign
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a foreign
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language
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. In my
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opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
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 learning a foreign
language
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open
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opens
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 many better opportunities for you.
This
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 essay will discuss both the view and give my
opinion
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.
Firstly
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, those who support that learning a foreign
language
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 is only for
traveling
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travelling
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 or
work
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 believe that when you travel to other countries
than
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,
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 you need
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language
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the language
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 for communication.
For example
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, Japanese people think that learning
foreign
Correct article usage
a foreign
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language
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 is only required when you need to
work
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 with foreign companies, they think it is a waste of time to learning a new
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language
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language,
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 you can
utilize
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utilise
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 that time
in
Change preposition
to
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 learn new skills.
However
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, others believe that learning a foreign
language
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 is not only for
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 or
work
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. They can have many opportunities
like
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, like
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they can get
Wrong verb form
getting
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 a job as
translator
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a translator
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,
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or
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 working as a tour guide.
For instance
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, in India
if
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, if
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 a person
had
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has
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 learned a foreign
language
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than
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, then
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 he can earn more in different
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
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 like customer support or as a tour guide or translator for documents. In my
opinion
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, learning a foreign
language
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 is very beneficial for every one they can get better opportunities
like
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, like
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 get a job.
Moreover
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, when they travel to
different
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a different
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country
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country,
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 they will not struggle to communicate with others. In conclusion,
although
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 both views have merit
but
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,
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 in my
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opinion
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opinion,
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 every person should learn a different
languages
Fix the agreement mistake
language
show examples
.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. Say why each side thinks this way, then add your own view with one or two clear reasons.
task response
Give more support for your ideas. Each main point needs a short explanation and one clear example.
task response
Keep your opinion clear from start to end. Your view is there, but it needs to be stronger in the body paragraphs too.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clearer paragraph plan: intro, one paragraph for first view, one for second view, one for your opinion, then conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simple way. Use words like first, however, for example, also, and in conclusion correctly.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph stay on one main idea. This will make your essay easier to follow.
task response
You discuss both views and you give your own opinion.
task response
You use examples about Japan and India, which helps support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is mostly easy to follow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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