IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Students generally prefer ti choose the period they are supposed to study and the period they are free to have fun. They should be allowed to do their time managment. Do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, there has been an ongoing debate about whether
students
Use synonyms
 should manage their own study
time
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 some believe that
students
Use synonyms
 should follow fixed schedules, I strongly agree that they should be allowed to manage their own
time
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, allowing
students
Use synonyms
 to manage their own
time
Use synonyms
 helps them become more responsible and independent. When
students
Use synonyms
 decide when to study and when to relax, they learn important life skills
such
Linking Words
 as discipline and organisation.
For example
Linking Words
, university
students
Use synonyms
 often succeed because they are able to plan their schedules effectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some people argue that
students
Use synonyms
 may misuse their
time
Use synonyms
 if they are given too much freedom.
This
Linking Words
 is because younger
students
Use synonyms
,
in particular
Linking Words
, might prefer entertainment over studying.
However
Linking Words
, with proper guidance from parents and teachers,
students
Use synonyms
 can gradually improve their
time
Use synonyms
 management skills. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 there are some risks, I believe that giving
students
Use synonyms
 the freedom to manage their own
time
Use synonyms
 is beneficial, as it helps them develop essential skills for their future.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
For task response, add one more clear idea on why free time choice helps study.
task response
For task response, use a more real example, not only a general one.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, link ideas with simple words like first, also, and however.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, make each main idea a little more full with one extra sentence.
task response
You answer the question clearly and your opinion is easy to see.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end.
coherence and cohesion
The ideas move in a logical way.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: