Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Raising children to be respectable members of society is of utmost importance.
This
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can be taught by their
parents
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, or be
learnt
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learned
at school. Both scenarios contain different, but equally crucial lessons. There is no denying the fact that your
parents
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are your first teachers. They are the first people you interact with, and you often mirror a lot of their characteristics. That being the case, it is essential that
parents
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act as good role models. The way you are raised at home will dictate how you treat others outside of it.
While
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schools may give you valuable information to help you progress professionally,
it
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they
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may not always teach you the values required to prosper as a member of society. For those who do not have the financial means to attend school, their
parents
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may be their only teachers in life. The role of their
parents
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then
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, then
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, to set a good example, becomes even more pronounced. Schools are usually your first exposure to people outside of your family.
This
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means that you see a wide range of characters. Learning to interact with them
,
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and deal with any conflicts you may have
,
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is a skill that you may not be able to learn at home. For students who are orphans
,
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or have absent-minded
parents
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, their teachers often have to fill in that role. Our education systems
also
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prepare us for situations we may face later on in our work life, which is not something you may be able to learn from home. In conclusion, it is evident that our families and schools have a massive impact in shaping our characters.
However
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, I believe that a combined effort from both sides is necessary to attain the best results.

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task response
Give one or two more clear real life examples to support your main ideas.
task response
Explain your own opinion more fully in the last body part, not only in the conclusion.
task response
Some ideas are good, but a few points are a bit general. Add more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow, but some link words can be used more carefully.
coherence and cohesion
Try to make each body paragraph focus on one main idea and develop it a little more.
coherence and cohesion
A few sentences are long. Shorter sentences can make your meaning even clearer.
task response
You discuss both views and give your own opinion.
task response
Your ideas are clear and stay on topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are in a logical order and easy to understand.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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