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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Space explorations costs taxpayers an extra orbitant amount of money each year. What are the advantages and disadvantages of spending money on space explorations?

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that
space
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exploration
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 requires a significant amount of public funding, often costing taxpayers large sums of money each year.
While
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 some people believe that
this
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 expenditure is justified, others argue that it is unnecessary and wasteful. In
this
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 essay, an attempt will be made to examine the advantages and disadvantages of investing in
space
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exploration
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. On the one hand, there are many benefits associated with spending money on
space
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exploration
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. One of the most apparent positive aspects is that it leads to scientific and technological advancement. To illustrate, research conducted in
space
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 has contributed to the development of new technologies that are later applied in everyday life.
For instance
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, satellite systems improve communication, navigation, and weather forecasting, which are essential for modern society.
In addition
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,
space
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exploration
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 can expand human knowledge about the universe and potentially provide solutions to long-term challenges
such
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 as resource shortages or climate monitoring.
On the other hand
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, there are
also
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 some drawbacks related to
this
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 investment that should not be overlooked. One negative aspect is the high financial cost, which could be used to address more immediate social issues. To clarify, governments may need to prioritise spending on healthcare, education, or poverty reduction
instead
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 of funding expensive
space
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 missions.
For example
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, in developing countries, allocating large budgets to
space
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 programmes may seem inappropriate when basic public services are still lacking.
Furthermore
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, the benefits of
space
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exploration
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 are often long-term and indirect, which may not justify the immediate expense. To recapitulate, it is evident that
space
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exploration
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 offers significant scientific and technological benefits,
while
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 the main drawback is its high cost and opportunity cost for other public needs. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, provided that governments maintain a balanced approach to spending and continue to address urgent social priorities.

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task response
For task response, add one more clear and real example for each side. This will make your ideas stronger and more full.
task response
For task response, explain your opinion a bit more in the end. Say why the good points are stronger than the bad points.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow, but some link words sound a bit formal or repeated. Use simple links in a natural way.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some points could be developed more before you move to the next idea. This will make each paragraph feel more complete.
task response
For task response, you answered both parts of the question and gave your own view clearly at the end.
task response
For task response, your main ideas are relevant and stay on topic through the essay.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you use paragraphing and link words well, so the reader can follow your ideas easily.
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