IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

To meet the growing needs of food for the increasing population, countries should make use of genetically engineered foods. However, some people believe that GM foods are not unhealthy but affect nature too. Do you think the advantages of GM food outweigh the drawbacks?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
In the modern world, it is undeniable that the growing global population has increased the demand for
food
Use synonyms
 production.
As a result
Linking Words
, genetically modified (
GM
Use synonyms
)
foods
Use synonyms
 have been introduced as a potential solution to
this
Linking Words
 challenge.
While
Linking Words
 some people believe that
GM
Use synonyms
foods
Use synonyms
 may harm the environment, others argue that their benefits are significant. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, an attempt will be made to examine both the advantages and disadvantages of
GM
Use synonyms
foods
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, there are many benefits associated with genetically engineered
foods
Use synonyms
. One of the most apparent positive aspects is that they can increase
food
Use synonyms
 production and improve
food
Use synonyms
 security. To illustrate,
GM
Use synonyms
crops
Use synonyms
 are often designed to be resistant to pests, diseases, and harsh environmental conditions, which leads to higher yields.
For instance
Linking Words
, farmers can produce more
crops
Use synonyms
 with fewer losses, helping to meet the needs of growing populations.
In addition
Linking Words
,
GM
Use synonyms
foods
Use synonyms
 may have enhanced nutritional value, which can help address malnutrition in developing countries.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
 some drawbacks related to
GM
Use synonyms
foods
Use synonyms
 that should not be overlooked. One negative aspect is their potential impact on the natural environment. To clarify, genetically modified
crops
Use synonyms
 may affect biodiversity by interfering with natural ecosystems.
For example
Linking Words
, the widespread use of
GM
Use synonyms
crops
Use synonyms
 could lead to the reduction of traditional plant varieties and harm beneficial insects.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there are concerns about long-term environmental consequences that are not yet fully understood. To recapitulate, it is evident that genetically modified
foods
Use synonyms
 offer significant advantages in improving
food
Use synonyms
 production and addressing global hunger,
while
Linking Words
 the main drawbacks include potential environmental risks. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, provided that strict regulations and monitoring systems are implemented to minimise potential harm.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
For task response, your answer is clear and you give both sides. To get a higher score, explain your own view more strongly in the body, not only in the end.
task response
For task response, your examples are good but still a bit general. Use one more clear and real example to make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow and each paragraph has one main idea. To improve, make some links between ideas more natural and less repeated.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some phrases like "one aspect" and "to illustrate" are used well, but there are many set phrases. Try to use simpler and more direct linking words too.
task response
You answer the question fully and discuss both advantages and disadvantages before giving your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a strong conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each main point is supported with an explanation and an example.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: