IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that making mistakes is the best way to learn. Others believe that following instructions carefully is more effective. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some people argue that learning from
mistakes
Use synonyms
 is the most efficient way for development,
whereas
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 others contend that it is more significant to take action in accordance with instructions. From my perspective, the most effective way to comprehend and understand a problem is
making
Change preposition
by making
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 a lot of
mistakes
Use synonyms
 because
mistakes
Use synonyms
 broaden one's horizons and
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also
Correct determiner usage
the
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 human brain mechanism relies on errors. On the one hand, the proponents of the idea that following certain methods is crucial suggest that instructions and clues offer people
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
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 information;
thus
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, making
mistakes
Use synonyms
 is unacceptable. They believe
this
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 because there are international standards and definite techniques for almost everything in the modern world.
For instance
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, for a complex machine structure, every detail is written and documented carefully in big corporations.
Following
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this
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, these documents are published as standards,
decreasing dramatically
Correct word order
dramatically decreasing
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 the possibility of making
mistakes
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, without faults and errors, real improvement and development would not be possible.
In other words
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, individuals have learned from devastating, arduous and treacherous tasks for them since the
beggining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of humanity. The human mind has
develeped
Correct your spelling
developed
 with major or minor
mistakes
Use synonyms
. The perfect example for
this
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 is that Edison invented the light bulb after trying and
disappointing
Verb problem
failing
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 a thousand times, and he said that I educated myself from other experiments
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I owe my success to other methods that I have used before. In conclusion,
although
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 there are some counter-arguments suggesting that following certain techniques and standards play a crucial role in
learning
Correct article usage
the learning
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 process, I remain convinced that
mistakes
Use synonyms
 are a key factor in personal development
and
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, and
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 without
them
Add a comma
them,
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 we could not enhance our abilities.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. Your view is clear, but the side about rules needs a bit more detail.
task response
Give one more clear example for each side. This will make your ideas stronger.
task response
Some ideas are good, but a few parts are not fully clear. Try to explain each main point in a simpler way.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, middle, and end. Keep this structure.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. Some links are fine, but a few sentences are long and hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has one main idea and clear support. This will help the flow.
task response
You discuss both views and give your opinion clearly.
task response
Your example about Edison is relevant and helps your point.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The essay moves in a logical order from one view to the other.
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