Prison is the best punishment for criminals. How far do you agree or disagree with this statement. Gives reasons for your answer and include any relavent examples from you own knowledge or experience.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →
These days, whenever people turn on the television or flick through a newspaper, they often hear about crime and its victims.
This
Linking Words
raises the question of how best to deal with the increasing crime rate.
While
Linking Words
some people believe that imprisonment is the most effective punishment, I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
view, as I believe it is not always appropriate or effective.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
prison
Use synonyms
conditions in some countries are not strict enough to act as a strong deterrent. Many inmates have access to facilities
such
Linking Words
as television, computers, and sports activities.
As a result
Linking Words
, life in
prison
Use synonyms
may not be as harsh as expected, and
therefore
Linking Words
may fail to discourage future criminal behaviour. In my opinion, if imprisonment is to be effective, it should be more challenging and restrictive.
Secondly
Linking Words
, not all offenders pose a serious threat to society.
For example
Linking Words
, minor offenders
such
Linking Words
as shoplifters are often placed in
prison
Use synonyms
alongside violent criminals.
This
Linking Words
not only wastes government resources but may
also
Linking Words
expose them to more serious criminal behaviour.
Consequently
Linking Words
, these individuals may leave
prison
Use synonyms
with worse habits than before.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is argued that prisons can play a role in rehabilitation. Some prisoners are given opportunities to study or learn new skills, which may help them reintegrate into society and reduce reoffending rates. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
prisons can provide some benefits, I believe they are not the best form of punishment in most cases. Alternative methods,
such
Linking Words
as community service or rehabilitation programmes, may be more effective, and imprisonment should be used only as a
last
Linking Words
resort.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer all parts of the question more fully. You gave your view clearly, but you can say more about why prison may still be needed for some crime.
task response
Add one more clear example from real life or common life. This will make your ideas stronger and easier to trust.
task response
Your main ideas are clear, but some points need more support. For example, the idea about prison life being easy needs a fuller reason or example.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end. To get a higher score, make the link between one paragraph and the next even smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas follow in a good order. You can improve by making each body paragraph focus on one main point and explain it a bit more deeply.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words well, but do not use too many simple ones in the same way. Try to vary them in a natural way.
task response
You give a clear opinion from the start and keep it the same to the end.
task response
You cover both sides of the topic, which helps show a balanced answer.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow because each paragraph has a clear job.
coherence and cohesion
You have both an introduction and a conclusion, and both match your main view.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
What to do next:
Look at other essays: