life experience could better gained through family and friends but other say personal experience is better. what are the advantages of both views. Which ones is better
A part of society believes that guardians and friends are the best mode of learning about
life
principles but remains
agree on the fact that personal Add the particle
remains to
experience
could be the better option for learning about life
. I wholeheartedly agree with the second notion because committing mistakes and then
improving them at the next stage could be an excellent choice, along with
this
when humans try to learn by themselves this
is a better option to explore individual qualities.
The most prominent benefit of working alone to get life
experience
is that it helps the public to do things in their personal way whether it is wrong or right and after they get its results out in their hand then
they get clarification, in which field they need improvement. For instance
, Rohan struggled a lot to get a job in Ratan Tata's company, he made various business proposals several times but the first two business models were not correct and he kept trying and got selected as the vice-president with his third model for the oil refining plant. The reason he was successful was because he kept learning from his errors. Furthermore
, if a person is working alone then
they would be able to explore themselves in a more creative manner. As they can find out about their strengths as well as
weaknesses. Therefore
, they can work on those to improve and make themselves a better person with improved qualities.
However
, the primary advantage of gaining life
experiences through elder's help is that they can provide a broader perspective on life
and can also
help people to prevent making common mistakes in life
. This
assistance could save the time and energy of their loved ones and they can allocate that time as well as
vigour in some other useful fields. Moreover
, gaining life
experience
from those who already faced that era could assist in improving the decision-making quality of individuals. For example
, Mukesh Ambani followed his father's suggestions and did chemical engineering and with his family's assistance, he is the second richest man in the world because he always made correct decisions in life
without wasting any time on experimenting with different ideas and followed a right and smooth path for the success.
To conclude
, gaining life
experiences through family and friend's support or through personal experiences both have their own pros but as I mentioned above, I think individual experience
is a much better path to choose for a better future.Submitted by ss6802125 on
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task response
Ensure the introduction clearly presents the topic and your viewpoint. The introduction here sets up the topic well but could more explicitly state your stance for clarity.
task response
In the body paragraphs, expand on your ideas with more varied examples. This could strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Work on varying sentence structures to add interest to your writing. This will keep the reader engaged and improve the readability of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use cohesive devices appropriately to ensure your ideas flow logically from one to the next. While you have done this to some extent, there can always be improvements to ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs and ideas.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.