These days, a great number of children prefer spending time on computer games instead of sports. Why? Is it positive or negative development?

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There is an ongoing debate regarding whether the increasing amount of

children

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spending time on computer

games

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instead

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of playing

sports

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is a positive or negative development. Some people believe that playing indoor activities

such

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as computer

games

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Correct word choice

and

show examples

videos is beneficial for

children

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, others argue that spending too much time on the computer may have negative consequences.

Therefore

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, before giving my opinion, I would like to discuss both perspectives. Examining the former opinion, the primary argument supporter would put forward is that

games

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are engineered to be highly engaging.

This

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is because

children

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can be easily attracted by offer immediate rewards, continuous dopamine hits

such

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as levelling up, unlocking items, and immersive graphics, which

sports

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cannot always match instantly.

In addition

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, proponents

also

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believe that many parents feel the outdoors is less safe

due to

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traffic or crime, encouraging indoor play.

Additionally

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, dense cities often lack accessible or affordable green spaces and

sports

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facilities.

On the contrary

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, the proponents of the latter opinion have their own arguments.

To begin

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with, they claim that a sedentary lifestyle heavily contributes to childhood obesity, poor posture, weakened immune systems, and vision problems like eye strain on screens.

Moreover

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, excessive gaming can lead to screen addiction, shortened attention spans, and in some cases, aggression or isolation from family members.

Furthermore

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while

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games

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offer virtual interaction, they do not teach crucial real-world social cues, body language, or in-person conflict resolution, which are naturally developed through team

sports

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To conclude

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, there are convincing arguments both for and against the development of playing video

games

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However

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, I personally believe that parents should let

children

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be able to get in touch with both types of entertainment activities. Balance

games

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and

sports

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would allow

children

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comprehensive development.

quynhtranhbh

May 13, 2026

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task response

Answer both questions more clearly. Say why children choose games, and then say more clearly why you think this is mostly negative or positive.

task response

Your view at the end is not fully clear. If you think balance is best, still say if this change is mainly negative or mainly positive.

task response

Add one or two simple real examples to support your ideas. This will make your points stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear paragraph plan, which is good. Keep this structure.

coherence and cohesion

Some ideas are long and not easy to follow. Use shorter sentences and simpler links like first, also, however, and finally.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure each main point is explained fully before you move to the next one.

task response

You answer the topic and discuss both sides before your opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Most ideas are in a logical order, so the reader can follow your essay.

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

allure
captivate
supervise
accessible
scarcity
safer alternative
peer pressure
educational tools
cognitive skills
implications
obesity
poor posture
hand-eye coordination
problem-solving abilities

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These days, a great number of children prefer spending time on computer games instead of sports. Why? Is it positive or negative development?

In most countries, prison is an effective solution to the problem of crime. Some people think it is a more effective solution to provide education for those who violate the law. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than at secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think it is better for people to change their career at least once in their life and do different kinds of jobs. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The proliferation of social media platforms has fundamentally altered communication patterns and interpersonal relationships. To what extent do you agree or disagree that this trend has a predominantly negative impact on society?