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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that it is more effective for students to study in a group, while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both view and give your own opinion

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There is an ongoing debate regarding whether
students
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 should
study
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 in groups or learn independently. Some people believe that organised
study
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 is more beneficial for society,
while
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 others argue that studying alone is a more effective method.
Therefore
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, before giving my own opinion, I would like to discuss
both
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 perspectives. Examining the former opinion, the primary argument supporters would put forward is that studying in a
group
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 allows
students
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 to exchange ideas and gain knowledge from one another. When learners discuss lessons together, they are often able to understand difficult concepts more effectively because different
students
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 may provide different explanations and viewpoints.
As a result
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,
group
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study
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 can improve
both
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 comprehension and problem-solving abilities.
For example
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,
students
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 preparing for important examinations frequently work in a
study
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group
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 to solve challenging exercises and share learning strategies.
In addition
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, studying with others helps
students
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 develop important social skills
such
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 as teamwork, communication and cooperation, which are highly valuable in modern workplaces.
On the other hand
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, many people believe that studying alone is a better approach because it enables
students
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 to concentrate more effectively. In quiet environments, learner can focus entirely on their studies without being distracted by unnecessary conversations or social activities.
Furthermore
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, self-
study
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 allows
students
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 to learn at their own pace and spend more time improving their weaknesses.
For instance
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, some learners may require additional time to revise grammar rules or practice mathematics, which may be difficult in
group
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 settings where
students
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 progress differently.
Consequently
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, studying independently can encourage self-discipline and help
students
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 become more responsible for their own learning. From my perspective,
group
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study
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 offers considerable benefits in terms of collaboration and community. I believe that combining
both
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 methods is the most effective approach.
Students
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 can participate in
group
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 discussions to broaden their understanding
while
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also
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 studying alone to strengthen concentration and revise knowledge more thoroughly. In
this
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 way, they can maximise
both
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 academic performance and personal development In conclusion,
while
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group
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study
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 can improve cooperation and knowledge-sharing, studying alone enhances concentration and independence. I believe that a balanced combination of these two methods is the best way for
students
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 to achieve academic success.

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task response
Write 'both views' not 'both view'. This is a small grammar mistake in the task sentence.
task response
Your answer gives both sides and your opinion, so the task is complete. To make it stronger, explain your own opinion a little more in the body, not only near the end.
task response
Some ideas are clear, but one line is not fully on topic: 'more beneficial for society' is too wide. Keep the focus on students and study only.
task response
Your examples are relevant, but they are quite general. Add one more clear and specific example to make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear 4-part structure: intro, one side, other side, and conclusion. This is easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Most linking words are used well, like 'On the other hand', 'For example', and 'In conclusion'. Try not to use too many simple linkers in the same way each time.
coherence and cohesion
One sentence has a small word choice issue: 'organised study is more beneficial for society' does not connect well with the topic. This slightly weakens flow.
coherence and cohesion
Your main points are supported, but some support could go deeper. For example, explain how group work helps with hard ideas in one more step.
coherence and cohesion
There is a small grammar issue: 'learner can focus' should be 'learners can focus' or 'a learner can focus'. Small errors like this can affect clarity.
task response
You answered all parts of the question and gave your own view clearly.
task response
Your main ideas are easy to understand and stay on the topic for most of the essay.
task response
The examples about exams, grammar, and maths fit the ideas well.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is well organised, with clear paragraphing and a strong ending.
coherence and cohesion
The writing moves in a clear order from one view to the other, then to your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words help the reader follow your ideas easily.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • collaborative learning
  • peer feedback
  • social interaction
  • deep understanding
  • group dynamics
  • personalized learning
  • self-discipline
  • concentration
  • diverse perspectives
  • isolation
  • motivation
  • peer support
  • groupthink
  • distractions
  • commitment
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