IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The
statistice
Correct your spelling
statistics
 show the number of tripe mad by
children
Use synonyms
 in one country over the past to years to travel to end from school using different modes of transport.
Use synonyms
children
Fix capitalization
Children
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 walking (13
million
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) are the by far
highset
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highest
,
while
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 the
children
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
use
Correct pronoun usage
who use
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bus
Check wording
buses
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 (7
million
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) are a bit higher than the
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children
Check wording
number of children
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use
Use synonyms
 car in 1990.
However
Linking Words
,
The
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the
show examples
children
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
car
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cars
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 (11
million
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) in 2010
significant
Replace the word
, significantly
 higher than
The
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the
show examples
children
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
bus
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buses
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 (5
million
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) in 2010. In
contrest
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contrast
,
The
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the number of
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children
Use synonyms
 walking (6
million
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) are Twice as high as the
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children
Check wording
number of children
show examples
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
using
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 cycling (3
million
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) in 2010.
Linking Words
overall
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Overall
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,
Linking Words
At
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at
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 the end priod there were 12,000,000
children
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 walking in 1990, 11,000,000
children
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Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
used
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 care in 2010
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 5,000,000
children
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use
Use synonyms
 bus.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words children, million, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • trips
  • children
  • modes of transport
  • walk
  • cycle
  • public transport
  • drive
  • car
  • trends
  • decrease
  • increase
  • shift
  • convenient
  • comfortable
  • commuting
  • traffic congestion
  • safety concerns
  • significant
  • indicate
  • reasons
  • traffic congestion
  • safety concerns
  • 20-year period
  • doubled
  • considerable margin
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