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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

stress is now a major problem in many countries around the world. What are some of the factors in modern society that causes this stress and how we reduce it

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It is argued that in many countries around the world,
stress
Use synonyms
 is considered a major problem. Uncalculated and unhealthy response to
stress
Use synonyms
 causes physical , emotional and mental overload.
This
Linking Words
 essay
favors with
Change the spelling
favours
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 the statement
emphasizing
Change the spelling
emphasising
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 the importance
Use synonyms
lifestyle
Change preposition
of lifestyle
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 balance, an outlined solution to curtail the problem. The demands of life
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 ever changing. Survival entails sustenance of a good supply in the most basic form of trade, money. Yes, our constant need to sustain our physiological needs
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as food, shelter, and clothing, is
also
Linking Words
 the root cause of our
stress
Use synonyms
. From a single mother juggling between roles, tending to a newborn and picking shifts. A student working after her classes for
allowance
Correct article usage
an allowance
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. We
Punctuation problem
, people
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people
Punctuation problem
people,
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 work harder in the hopes
to earn
Change preposition
of earning
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 better.
Consequently
Linking Words
resulting
Punctuation problem
, resulting
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to
Change preposition
in an
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 increase in workload, extended working hours, burnout, and lack of sleep. Reducing
these
Correct word order
this stress,
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stress
Use synonyms
, is
however
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 ,
possible
Correct word order
is possible
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.
and
Fix capitalization
And
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 the solution is
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 balance.
the
Fix capitalization
The
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 degree of motion should be parallel to relaxation. From a scheduled vacation, massage, yoga , and
soul enriching
Correct your spelling
soul-enriching
 movies and books. To a good festival, concert and bars. Modern
lifestyle
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 amplifies the availability of these sorts. Rest and comfort in varying forms are
but
Correct word choice
apply
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just one click away from us. In conclusion ,
As
Fix capitalization
as
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 we traverse through life ,
stress
Use synonyms
 is undoubtedly
imminent
Punctuation problem
imminent,
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 compounded by our needs.
However
Linking Words
, a good projection of priorities, clear boundaries, and
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 modification can ultimately ensure our
well being
Correct your spelling
well-being
.

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task response
Answer both parts more clearly: what causes stress, and how to cut it.
task response
Use 2 or 3 clear main causes, then give matching ways to reduce them.
task response
Give one real and clear example for each main idea.
coherence and cohesion
Make each body paragraph about one main point only.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simple way with words like first, also, because, so, and finally.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order and grammar, because some lines are hard to follow.
task response
You clearly show that stress is a big world problem.
task response
You include both causes and solutions, so the answer covers the full topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Some examples help the reader see your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • unemployment
  • financial instability
  • social safety nets
  • constant connectivity
  • work-life balance
  • remote work
  • social isolation
  • community support
  • chronic illnesses
  • affordable healthcare
  • public health campaigns
  • mental well-being
  • high-stakes testing
  • holistic education
  • flexible working hours
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