Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Historical records tell us that punishment remained a prominent element in the treatment of offences. Some individuals argue that to reduce unlawful actions, prolonged detention is one of the most effective methods.
However
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, few people are of the opinion that other options can be effective to minimize felony. I will discuss both points of view before stating my own point of view in
this
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essay.
To begin
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with, there is no doubt that extended prison sentences leave a psychological impact to reduce
crime
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because they create fear among
offenders
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. If
offenders
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know they may stay in prison for many years, they may stop before committing any bad act.
This
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idea is much stronger for serious unlawful actions
such
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as murder, rape, and armed robbery.
Therefore
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, longer imprisonment can prevent significant
crime
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rates from happening.
Secondly
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, long prison serves to public safety by isolating
offenders
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, particularly those who are violent or repeat
offenders
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. Detaining
such
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individuals will not only safeguard society from their wrongdoings, but it
also
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gives them a chance to correct themselves during extended detention.
Furthermore
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, extended detention will discourage potential criminals from committing offences
due to
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the fear of severe punishment.
This
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theory is supported by the idea that harsher penalties may lead to a decrease in
crime
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rates in society. In my opinion, adopting the middle ground is best suited to curtail rising
crime
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by sentencing long-term
offenders
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, investing in education, reducing poverty, and creating better opportunities for at-risk individuals. By focusing on prevention, society may be able to reduce
crime
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rates more effectively than through punitive measures alone.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You talk more about long prison, but the other side is very short.
task response
Give your opinion more clearly and earlier. Keep it clear from start to end.
task response
Add one or two real and clear examples to support your ideas.
task response
Write a full conclusion. Your last part is more like your opinion only, not a full ending.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear paragraph order: intro, one side, other side, opinion, conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, as a result.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point more. Some ideas stop too fast.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are easy to follow in most parts.
coherence and cohesion
You use paragraphs well for different main ideas.
task response
You answer the topic and give your opinion.
task response
Your points about fear and public safety are relevant to the topic.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deterrent
  • incapacitating
  • rehabilitation
  • recidivism
  • underlying issues
  • desperation
  • community service
  • mental health support
  • reintegration
  • prevention
  • offenders
  • punitive measures
  • support systems
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