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Writing Samples
Band 7

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say this is a positive trend, while others argue that it leads to negetive consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and then give your own opinion.

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There is a continuously increasing use of computing devices in teaching.
While
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 some encourage
this
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 development, others are afraid of its adverse impacts.
This
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 essay agrees that the overgrowth of technology in education has simplified the learning and searching process. On one hand, utilising computers in teaching has made it easier for
students
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 to access correct and updated information with a click of a button, as learners do not have to spend many hours in libraries reading many books to find the info they are looking for , and they won't have to worry about the novelty of it.
For instance
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, by asking artificial intelligence any question, it immediately provides an answer after searching millions of sources in a matter of seconds.
On the other hand
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, a considerable number of people believe that the excessive usage of technology may affect the employment of educators, where teaching wouldn't require existing in the same room with a teacher, as online classes and pre-recorded lessons would be cheaper for educational institutes which will
also
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 impact the
students
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 as they will overlook important skills that can be learnt in a classroom by interacting with others and teachers like debate and patience.
For example
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, most
students
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 will skip a few minutes in video lessons , which may lead to missing out
important
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on important
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 knowledge. In conclusion,
while
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 the benefits of technology, particularly the internet, allow
students
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 to tap into limitless sources of information, some still feel that it will raise concerns regarding the employment of educators.
However
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, as long as we carefully consider the importance of human interaction in education, the educational benefits are clearly positive.

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task response
Make your main view more clear in the first part and keep it the same all through the essay.
task response
Discuss both sides in a more even way. The good side is clear, but the bad side needs one more clear point.
task response
Use examples that feel more real and direct. This will make your ideas stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Link some long ideas with shorter sentences. This will make your meaning easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with words like 'where' and 'which' in long sentences, because they make the line hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Add a clearer topic sentence at the start of each body part to guide the reader.
task response
You answer all parts of the question and give your own opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You use examples to support both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion matches your main idea.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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