IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve alone. Instead, it requires the cooperation of individuals, governments, and large companies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is no denying the fact that saving
money
Use synonyms
 has become an essential habit in modern life.
While
Linking Words
 it is a commonly held belief that everyone, regardless of age, should set aside
money
Use synonyms
 for future needs, there is
also
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 an argument that opposes it, claiming that young
people
Use synonyms
 should focus on enjoying the present rather than worrying about savings. In my opinion, I consider that saving
money
Use synonyms
 from a young age is crucial for long-term financial security.
To begin
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 with, developing the habit of saving early helps individuals build financial stability over time.
In other words
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,
money
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 saved during youth can accumulate and provide a safety net for unexpected expenses later in life.
In addition
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, saving teaches young
people
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 valuable skills
such
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 as budgeting and responsible spending.
For example
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, a person who starts saving a small amount monthly from the age of twenty will have a significant fund by the time they reach thirty. Another point to consider, without savings,
people
Use synonyms
 often struggle financially during emergencies
such
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 as job loss or medical issues. It is
also
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 possible to say that relying solely on income without any backup can lead to debt and financial stress.
Moreover
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, saving
money
Use synonyms
 allows individuals to achieve important life goals,
such
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 as buying a house or funding their education.
For instance
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, many young adults who saved consistently were able to afford university tuition without taking out loans. In conclusion, despite
people
Use synonyms
 having different views, I believe that saving
money
Use synonyms
 is a vital practice for everyone, including the youth, as it secures financial stability and helps achieve future goals.

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task response
Read the topic very carefully. Your essay talks about saving money, but the task is about the environment. This is the main problem.
task response
Answer all parts of the task. You need to say if you agree or disagree, and talk about people, government, and big companies.
task response
Use ideas that match the question only. Do not use a ready introduction for a different topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end. This is good for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words like 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'In conclusion' help the flow. But some are a bit long and repeated in style.
coherence and cohesion
Support each main point with ideas about the topic. Your examples are clear, but they support the wrong topic.
coherence and cohesion
You use a clear paragraph plan with an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion is short and clear.
task response
Some examples are easy to understand.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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