IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows average Household expenditure in 2019 and 2

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The pie chart illustrates the average
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
household
which is expending
Replace the word
expenditure
 between 2019 and 2020.
Overall
Linking Words
, from the information
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
given
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 largest section is
food
Correct article usage
the food
show examples
 industry follow by
housing
Correct article usage
the housing
show examples
sectment
Correct your spelling
sector
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the smallest is education and healthcare.
While
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 everythings are changing and expending it has been
compares
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
as a result
Linking Words
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 2019 the largest section is food
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is standing at 55 per
cent
Use synonyms
, and
follow
Wrong verb form
followed
show examples
 by housing
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
is stood
Wrong verb form
stands
show examples
 at 20 per
cent
Use synonyms
form
Use the right word
for
show examples
 all the family
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, in three groups which are education, other
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 and service
then
Linking Words
 healthcare are standing among 5 - 13 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Change preposition
in 2020
show examples
2020
Punctuation problem
2020,
show examples
 the largest still
stand by
Verb problem
apply
show examples
food
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 it decreased
14
Change preposition
by 14
show examples
 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, healthcare and other
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 and service are have been
contribute
Wrong verb form
contributing
show examples
, both of these have been
ecourage
Wrong verb form
encouraging
show examples
 17 per
cent
Use synonyms
 approximately.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, education
extremely
Verb problem
was extremely
show examples
lost
Correct word choice
low
show examples
 in
contributed
Replace the word
contributions
 from all
sectioins
Correct your spelling
sections
 of
houshold
Check wording
households
show examples
, there was only 2 per
cent
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the end of
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in contrast".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stand" was used 4 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average spending
  • household expenditure
  • compare
  • increase
  • decrease
  • rise
  • fall
  • higher than
  • lower than
  • the largest part
  • the smallest part
  • in 2019
  • in 2020
  • spent more on
  • spent less on
  • changed over time
  • similar
  • different
  • clear trend
  • overall
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