Nowadays, tourists and scientists are allowed to travel to remote natural environments. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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In today's fast-paced world, there is an increased interest among researchers and tourists in visiting rural
places
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without any restrictions.
While
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it has some upsides, the downsides,
such
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as leading to contamination
due to
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frequent visits and diseases caused by extreme conditions, can be far greater than broadening knowledge and enjoying new experiences, which are some of
benefits
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the benefits
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of going to these
places
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. On the one hand, one of the advantages of scientists visiting rural
places
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is that these areas can help them expand their knowledge about Earth.
This
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is because remote environments have unique
species
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, allowing researchers to understand the complexity of life
which
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, which
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can shed light on how people can adapt to new life forms.
In addition
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, adventurers can experience new extreme sports in these areas, and they improve their skills because remote
places
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have different kinds of geography that
makes
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make
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acquiring new abilities easier.
For instance
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, well-known remote
places
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,
such
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as Antarctica and Greenland, provide an enormous amount of information, enabling polar explorers to broaden their knowledge about how
species
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gradually overcome challenges
,
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apply
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which seem impossible to adapt to.
Thus
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, these visits not only give scientists opportunities to improve their
knowledege
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knowledge
but
also
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allow adventurers to expand their capabilities.
On the other hand
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,
this
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allowance has detrimental effects on the environment, which presents some drawbacks. The reason for
this
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is that the urge to experience new rural
places
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leads to drawing people's attention, which threatens the environment of untouched
places
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.
As a result
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, travellers need more transportation vehicles to reach these areas, which results in an increase in carbon emissions that deteriorate the air quality. To illustrate, deforestation, sparked by building new infrastructure for new tourist buildings, has given rise to irreversible environmental problems in Patagonia, which has become one of the most popular tourist destinations recently.
This
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is because the changing pattern in forests leads to a threat of extinction of some
species
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.
Thus
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, there is a negative link between the travel allowance to the remote place and environmental issues. In conclusion,
although
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it has some benefits, the drawbacks of allowing access to visiting rural
places
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makes
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make
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it difficult to preserve natural habitat and prevent
species
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from extinction. These drawbacks create major problems in future, which cannot be reversed by any methods,
which
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and
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outweigh the benefits.

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task response
Make your main view more clear from the start and keep it the same in all parts.
task response
Add one more clear reason for why the bad side is stronger than the good side.
task response
Use examples that are more direct and easy to link to your main point.
task response
Put topic words like remote natural places all through the essay, not rural places.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas are good, but a few are hard to follow. Make each point shorter and more direct.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words well, but do not use too many long chains with which and because.
coherence and cohesion
Make each body paragraph follow one simple plan: main point, reason, example, result.
coherence and cohesion
Check reference words so each this, these, and which is very clear.
task response
You answer both sides and give a clear opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You use examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Your linking words help the reader move through the essay.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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